


Heaven Sent

by wehaveabucky



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Guardian Angels, F/M, Guardian Angels, guardian angel reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-17
Updated: 2018-12-17
Packaged: 2019-09-21 03:28:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 30,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17035754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wehaveabucky/pseuds/wehaveabucky
Summary: When Bucky Barnes’ guardian angel is sent down to protect him by his side, she isn’t exactly what he’s expecting from an angel...





	1. Chapter 1

Being James Buchannan Barnes’ guardian angel had never been easy. But most of all, it had never been normal. 

A normal guardian angel experience would be to watch them grow. Sure, there were moments where there was pain – in some lives more often than others. But there was always the reassurance that they were growing. Aging. Until eventually, they finished their path and that was the end of that guardian angels job. 

When James had been born, Y/N thought her job would be relatively simple. He had a good family and a good best friend. And he listened to her directions. He protected those he cared for and he had fun. 

But then the war hit. Y/N came into work each morning, sat at her desk and watched as the janitors cleared away another angel’s station. It was always quiet, and everyone seemed a little dazed. The usual bright white glow of the place seemed dimmer with the nerves of it all, and most of the angels’ steady hands shook as they tried desperately to guide their humans to safety. 

James was drafted. Y/N had let out a sob when the telegram came. Bucky had sobbed with her, his mother’s arms smoothing over his back as he clutched at his hair. He was scared. 

32557038\. Sergeant Barnes, James Buchannan of the 107th Infantry Regiment.

It was engrained into both their minds. And it was the moment Y/N thought her job was going to be a short one. She was certain of it when Bucky had gone to the front lines in France and had been captured by Hydra. 

She screamed with him when they tore his brain to pieces. It wasn’t that she felt the pain too although all she wanted was to take it from him and carry the burden. It was that with whatever they did to him, each shock, each freeze, each needle, she lost a little bit of him. She lost her ability to help. And so, she sat, slumped in her chair, watching as they ripped apart the very thing she had been sworn to protect.

When Steve came, it felt like things were going okay. Both she and Bucky were overwhelmed with relief – and surprise – when that hunk of a man broke down the door and rescued him. But it was short-lived, because barely a year later, Y/N was watching Steve desperately reach out for his best friend, only for Bucky to fall endlessly against the snow. 

She had been dragged out screaming by the other angels, each of them feeling the hurt radiating off her as her light dimmed. She hadn’t expected to walk into work a week later and be sat at the same desk – watching the life of James Buchannan Barnes again. Only this time, it was hardly a life at all. 

It only made Y/N’s determination grow – she pushed harder to break through. For over fifty years she sat at her desk doing nothing when he was frozen. She begged and pleaded, violently protesting any attempt to wipe his memory when those trigger words were spoken. She screamed at him when he killed, trying desperately to reinstall the conscience she knew was buried deep beneath layers of programming and pain.

The other angels noticed her grow hard. She looked like the rest of them. She still wore the white chiffon and silk of an angel. Her wings retained their smooth white feathers. Her skin still sparkled gold. 

But Y/N no longer acted like an angel. She lost her politeness. She lost the smooth tone of an angel and it became harsh. She was sarcastic and snappy with her co-workers. She was sarcastic and snappy with her superiors. But no one doubted that she had a reason to be just that. And so they took it in their stride.

Y/N became almost the class clown, using her humour as a defence mechanism when the worst days hit. It was an attempt to detach herself from the horrors she saw in daily life. No-one knew exactly the extent of the anguish she experienced vicariously through Bucky on a daily basis. She used to show colleagues videos of Bucky swooping in to save Steve or of him hugging his sisters, flirting with a girl, going to the Stark Expo. Now, no one asked to see what Bucky was up to nowadays because it wouldn’t be good.

There were days when sarcasm and wit couldn’t cover her pain. When Bucky would be tortured until he was nearly dead, she’d curl up in a ball on the floor and squeeze her eyes shut, begging them to end it – to let him die and let her free. But it never happened. They always kept him alive – physically at least – and Y/N was left working late in the night, trying to piece back together his brain.

When Hydra fell, Y/N was too far gone. She’d seen too much and, although Bucky couldn’t possibly remember all of what he had done – not with all the wiping and resetting – Y/N did. And it haunted her perhaps more than it haunted Bucky. She remained the cold, hard, sarcastic angel Hydra had turned her into and there was no escape from that now. 

But she was good at her job. It was another thing no one denied. She kept him as safe and as stable as she could for the longest time. A less experienced guardian would have lead him right back to Steve – after all they knew who he was. Y/N knew better. She may know Steve – but Bucky did not. Not yet. And so she spent over a year guiding him back to him in a more subtler way. With books and museums, all the while, hiding out, knowing this wasn’t truly the end.

And she was right. The events of the Civil War tested her. On the one hand, she could drive Bucky to complete safety – away from Steve, the Avengers, his past. She could have kept him on the run. Bucky didn’t have to help Steve find the base. He didn’t have to protect his friend. 

But one thing had been pinned on Y/N’s pinboard since the day Bucky was born. 

Life is an echo.

Maybe Bucky had unintentionally put a lot of bad into the world over the past century – but he sure as hell wasn’t going to continue to. Life is an echo and Y/N would be damned if that echo wasn’t going to be a good one from now on.

Wakanda had been the ultimate second chance for Bucky and it had been all she’d dreamed of for him. She watched with tears in her eyes as Shuri and the other techs in Wakanda healed him as best they could. She longed for the days Bucky would work on his farm until sunset. She felt peace wash over the both of them when Bucky sat in the grass, a goat kid in his lap and a bottle clutched in his hand, watching the breath-taking Wakandan sunset set over the trees. 

However, Bucky would never be Bucky without his protective instinct. Y/N thought, and partly hoped, that that protective instinct would be fulfilled with his life on the farm. That changed with Steve’s first visit – when she felt the protectiveness swell in Bucky’s heart when Steve told him of his antics. Y/N knew that although this life was peaceful for Bucky – although it was safe and secure – it would never be completely what he wanted. 

Shuri made him a new arm the next week. He left his farm with the father of one of the children he’d helped in the area – with the promise of visiting at least once a month – and moved into the city. He became one of T’Challa’s guard, working adjacent to the Dora Milaje, and helped on Black Panther missions as his new codename – The White Wolf.

When Steve made his ninth visit, a little over a year later, Bucky was ready to leave with him. Back to New York – to the Avengers. Y/N knew this would mean more danger, but a good echo. And that’s all she wanted for Bucky. 

It was on his second day on the compound that she got a call from her superior, asking her to come to his office. She begrudgingly made her way past all the other desks, stomping rather less gracefully than an angel was expected to until she reached the white door of Anthony’s office. 

“Anthony, this better be good because Sam finally taught Bucky the wonders of free online porn and-“ She froze when she noticed it wasn’t just Anthony that was sat in the office. A short man with white hair and a moustache was leant against the wall, holding a paper weight in his hands. He was looking at her, but he and Anthony were facing each other, indicating they had been talking before she entered. Both wore pristine cream suits and ties, eyebrows cocked at your speech.

Y/N instantly recognised the man – who wouldn’t. He was the all-seeing one. He held all the power in the universe and most people living in it didn’t even know it. 

“Mr. Lee,” Y/N’s cocky tone dropped when she curtseyed, turning soft and pleasant – how an angel’s should be.

“Please, Y/N, call me Stan.” He said, sitting at the head of Anthony’s desk. Anthony sat beside him on an armchair he’d pulled up, gesturing for Y/N to sit before them at the other side of the table. Y/N followed the order immediately, hands folded in her lap as she chewed her lip.

“I’ve been watching you closely over the past millennia, Y/N,” Stan leant forward on his elbows, narrowing his eyes at her. She chewed her lip harder and tapped her sandals softly against the carpet. “It has been a tough one, has it not?”

“It hasn’t been… normal,” Y/N settled with, furrowing her brow. She felt a need to defend herself. “But I have tried my best.” 

Stan laughed, sitting back in his chair and shooting a glance at Anthony who smiled. Y/N instantly felt self-conscious.

“We know that,” Anthony nodded, shooting her a look that was meant to reassure her. Anthony had been superior here since she started and had been along for most of Bucky’s toughest rides. At his support, Y/N relaxed a little, turning back to Stan with pursed lips.

“May I ask why I have been called in here?” 

“We’re thinking of trying something new,” Stan stood, rounding the table so he was stood before you. “James Barnes has been an interesting case for you and he will continue to be for a long time now I assume. We have come across very few cases like this in the past, but we have never truly figured out a way to deal with them properly. We were hoping, you would try out a new way.”

Y/N shifted in her seat uncomfortably, glancing between Stan and Anthony nervously. 

“We would like you to go down to Earth.” Stan placed a hand on Y/N’s shoulder, forcing her to focus on him. “To be by his side. Support him from there.”

There was a moment of silence as Y/N let her composure fall. She stood, a look of shock on her face as she tried to control her breathing.

“You want me to go down to Earth. Me. An Angel. Go down.” Y/N muttered before cracking a small smile and mumbling under her breath. “That’s what she said.”

Anthony tried to stifle a giggle at her words and Y/N fought to recompose herself.

“This is insane.” She laughed, stumbling backwards away from Stan who smiled calmly at her.

“Listen, Y/N. These Avengers and super soldiers, they don’t just need intense emotional guidance and protection. They need as much physical protection as we can give them too. And so for that, we were thinking that you need to join him on Earth too.” 

“Why not try this on Steve’s guardian angel. Or Carol. Or what’s her face erm… you know…”

“Diana Prince?” Anthony suggested, and Y/N snapped her fingers, enthusiastically pointing 

“Her!” 

“Not under our jurisdiction.” Stan shook his head. “And as for Steve and Carol, they’ve been through a lot. But they’re not ready for the world yet.” 

“You on the other hand are cold, sarcastic, occasionally mean, sometimes a bit of a bitc-“

“Alright, alright Anthony. We get the picture,” Y/N raised her hand to silence him and Anthony scoffed out a laugh.

“What he means is, you’re ready to live on earth. You’re ready for this.”

Y/N spluttered to find a new excuse and the men watched her fail, leaving her a spluttering, sighing mess.

“I don’t have a choice in this do I?” She finally mumbled, slumping her shoulders and running her hand through her smooth hair. 

“No, I’m afraid you don’t,” Stan smiled, throwing his arms out in a gesture as if to say ‘what can I do?’ Y/N wanted to say ‘a lot, Stan, you’re in charge of this shit show,’ but she didn’t. She just slumped back into the chair and threw here head back, looking up at the ceiling of fluffy white and pink clouds above her.

“Alright, Bucky boy. Get ready for hell.”


	2. Chapter 2

The evening sky was almost golden, the sun dipping over the horizon so the clouds looked like mounds of vanilla ice cream. The good kind. The almost yellow, vanilla bean speckled kind. The cloudless sky behind it was a paling blue - so pale it was almost white, giving the entire thing a silvery tone. 

Bucky thought the sky on evenings like these was as close to heaven he’d ever get. And as he sat on the lawn of the compounds grounds, thinking over his past, he decided to stay out even longer, prolonging his exposure to what he was sure would be the most ethereal thing he’d ever experience. 

It was the start of June and had been an abnormally hot day. The kind of hot that had those without the super-human abilities to deal with the weather submerged in a pool or shut up inside with the air conditioning turned on full blast. 

But Bucky hadn’t seen the attraction to lazing by the pool all day, the idea of his skin pruning with all that time in the water not worth the small satisfaction it would bring. And even if it wasn’t damaging his skin or health, air conditioning units always made him feel dry and gave him the itching feeling that his skin was cracking. 

Besides, he had the super-human abilities to deal with the heat and humidity. So, he’d sat on the lawn pretty much all day, reading or snoozing, watching a movie on the tablet Tony had gifted him on his arrival or talking to Steve when he’d sat with him for a while. 

He supposed he had to go in soon - after all, he hadn’t had lunch since that picnic Steve had brought him in the early afternoon. Plus, Sam had sent a message to the team about having a Barbecue tonight and the nostalgia of hot dogs and beers was very tempting.   
But then the sky changed within minutes, from ice cream gold to peach skin orange, the once silver blue sky a now blush pink. 

This. This was as close to heaven he was ever going to get. 

It was just as he was about to pack up his stuff, stretching up towards the sky to alleviate the sticking of his joints that the cloud above him parted and a bright white light shone through. Bucky hadn’t thought it strange at first, but then he realised the sun was setting to the west. This light was coming from directly above. 

It travelled slowly at first, creeping closer and growing larger. And then all of a sudden, it was moving faster, heading directly to the area in which Bucky stood. It hit the ground and it was then that Bucky realised it wasn’t just a beam of light. 

-

From the patio off the living area, the team thought it might be Thor. They were gathered loosely in small groups around the barbecue, Tony wearing a black apron printed with the words “my sausage is on fire” and a pair of tongs in his hand. Sam was beside him, wearing a red apron that read “why you all up in my grill” and held a spatula. 

All afternoon, they had been arguing over who was king of the grill. None of the team had the heart to tell them that Steve was actually better – not even Steve – and so they had let them have their precious grill off to preserve their egos.

It was Steve who realised it wasn’t Thor. He was all too aware of how close the landing site was to Bucky and he knew if it had been Thor, he would’ve landed much closer to where the Avengers were gathered.

But this light was falling right next to the oak where he’d left Bucky earlier - and where F.R.I.D.A.Y had informed him five minutes ago Bucky still sat. 

It wasn’t the usual, fast, rainbow-stream of light that Thor would step out of. It was slower – creeping and ominous, and all white. So, he dropped his beer to the table, not even glancing at the team as he began descending the steps to the lawn. 

“Nat,” he called out, but it was pointless. She was following him now anyway, calling over her shoulder to the rest of the confused group. 

“Whatever that is, it isn’t Thor.”

-

Whatever it was, Bucky was mesmerised by it. She lay on the grass, peacefully asleep. Or at least he hoped she was asleep. He quickly checked for a pulse and noted her chest rising and falling with each breath. Good. Asleep.

She looked human. Except, she wasn’t quite that… He couldn’t place it. But this thing felt different. She definitely seemed out of place here on earth, and when Bucky thought back to church on Sunday morning with his mother and Steve and all of his sisters – he couldn’t help but tie this creature to the tales he’d heard of angels. 

There was a strange glow to its skin, golden and silver sparks seemed almost like freckles. It covered every inch of her – her hands, her neck, her cheeks, her hair. When he took a hand in his, lifting it to double check the pulse, it was softer than anything he’d ever felt.

She was wearing a dress of what seemed to be silk – white and long and yet, on her feet a pair of white sneakers and covering her arms was a white leather jacket. Bucky ran a bit of fabric of the dress through his fingers – first his flesh, to feel it better. To embed the texture in his brain. And then with is metal arm, to deduce the fabric from its range of intel. It scanned it subconsciously, filtering through and through millions of possibilities until it came up blank, giving him percentages of compounds and chemicals that he couldn’t place – nothing that made up any sort of fabric. 

Steve reached Bucky in no time, long strides propelling him across the lawn. He’d been terrified that this had been their worst fear. Hydra back for him. Hydra coming to take him away again. Hydra set to undo all of Bucky’s progress. He couldn’t lose him, not again, and the thought of being too late – like he had been so many times before – was something he couldn’t bear. 

And maybe it still was Hydra. Evil. But when Steve finally saw what his friend was crouched over – what had presumably fell from the sky – he couldn’t help but relax a bit. The woman had that effect – maybe it was a power, maybe it was just a natural appearance. Whatever it was exuded good. Whatever it was exuded trust. 

“Bucky, are you okay?” Nat asked, coming up behind Steve a couple of seconds after he’d stopped. She too was dumbfounded by the woman, head cocking and red hair falling over her shoulder as she took in the creature’s appearance. Bucky looked up and frowned. Blinking three times to sift through his thoughts, trying to find something to say.

“She just fell here. I didn’t know… I don’t know…” He glanced down at her again and dropped her hand onto the grass. The rest of the team approached slowly, peering around to see what it was. 

“Let’s get her inside,” Nat finally said, stepping forward. Bucky was quick to act, scooping up the girl up, careful to make sure the fabric of her dress didn’t get caught between the Vibranium plates of his arm. She almost seemed to float then, like her weight wasn’t completely weighing down his arms but instead was defying gravity, hovering so he was carrying her but not necessarily lifting her. It threw him off balance and he stumbled the first few steps, the sensation of holding someone and yet not at the same time. 

He carried her past the barbeque and inside, laying her down on one of Tony’s sleek modern couches with solid white upholstery and matching cushions. They all watched her again for a while. Some just admired, not sure what else they were supposed to do in this situation. Those with more cautious minds analysed – looking for clues as to who or what she was. Scars, tattoos, glimpses of anything recognisable. But nothing.

“So, we gonna just keep her here or turn her over to the authorities?” Clint piped up, standing over her with his arms crossed over his chest. Bucky frowned at him.

“She landed here,” he retorted quickly, some weird part of him not wanting to let her go yet.

“We’re the Avengers, Robocop, not the ASPCA,” Tony retorted, already pulling up the contact information for his acquaintances in the FBI. Bucky’s head snapped to his with shock and panic, a look none of them had seen in a while. Tony’s finger faltered for a second over the call button and Steve swallowed, reaching out and wrapping his fingers around Tony’s forearm. 

“How about we keep her here till she wakes up. She can explain some things to us, and if we still feel it’s appropriate to hand her over to a different organisation, we shall,” his voice was steady and commanding – his Captain tone. Nobody but Tony questioned that tone. Tony scoffed but closed his phone, tucking it in his back pocket. Steve shot him a grateful smile and sighed, frowning at the sleeping figure. “Besides, she can’t do any harm if she’s asleep.”  
Despite Steve, Bucky, and a few of the others, being convinced that this woman would bring them no harm once she woke, the overwhelming and more anxious consensus was that they’d tie her up just in case. It had been a close call, but when Tony had said that this way they could all enjoy the barbecue without one of them having to watch the creature, Sam was swayed, and it was left to Nat to carry the suspiciously weightless woman from the sofa, to a dining chair, tying her wrists semi tightly with tape sourced from a kitchen drawer. 

Bucky wouldn’t have minded staying watch over her, and after he grabbed a hotdog from Sam outside, he had the intentions to sit inside and eat it, waiting until she woke up. But halfway to the door, Steve had lay a heavy hand on his shoulder and halted him in his tracks. Bucky had turned, earning an understanding smile from his best friend.

“We’ll know when she wakes up pal. Just sit down and relax for a bit.”

And so, Bucky had sat with the team, slowly bringing himself into their conversation and banter, distracting him from the woman in the chair. He talked amiably with Steve and Nat, teased Tony and Sam, and laughed along with the others when they ridiculed Rhodes for telling them the same story he’d tried to tell them last week – only to receive indifferent looks and sheepish smiles.

She was all but forgotten as the team moved onto their fourth bottle of wine, the sun now almost completely set, leaving the sky a dark orange over the trees, rising into a darkening blue. They laughed as Pepper told an embarrassing story about Tony, Tony hiding behind his wine glass with blushing cheeks. He’d shake his head, smiling as though he wasn’t affected, but his warning yet playful squeezes of Pepper’s thigh beneath the table indicated he wasn’t exactly happy with the team of super soldiers knowing this story. 

Bucky began pouring himself another glass as the story neared its close, the ending much more endearing than the beginning – eliciting smiles of admiration rather than snickers of amusement. Bucky had raised the now full glass of red wine to his lips, sipping the sweet liquid once. Pepper and Tony leaned closer, pressing their lips together and Bucky looked away subconsciously, to avoid the PDA. 

His eyes fell on the door, and he gulped, dropping his wine glass with a clatter against the table. It spilt all over the white table cloth, over Steve’s plate and began dripping onto his lap. Steve was about to chastise him, but when he saw that Bucky was no longer sat next to him, instead standing upright with his fists clenched, he held back, turning to see what had made him so jolty.

She was stood there, completely out of restraints and definitely no longer in the chair. Her jacket had been shrugged from her shoulders, laid somewhere inside the house, and her shoes were by her feet instead of on them. She was leaning on the doorway, hair blowing in the breeze, and a smirk on her lips. 

The team all stood too, hands reaching to place themselves on wherever they had a weapon conveniently stashed. The woman noticed this and smiled cheekily.

“How’d you get out?” Nat asked, stepping forward a little to get a better stance. They were all poised to attack, and Y/N knew she should probably leap into an explanation, to get them onto her side and keep them from killing her. But that wasn’t her style. So instead she shrugged nonchalantly, as if it had been the easiest thing in the world (which to her it had) and stepped out onto the patio, dress fluttering in the wind. She scanned each Avenger carefully, already knowing their names, before her golden eyes fixed on Bucky’s. He swore he stopped breathing when she spoke, her voice melodic and yet instilled a fear in him he couldn’t quite place.

“Well hello, sunshine.”


	3. Chapter 3

Across the universe, three red suns burned bright over Chaos. The city burned red too, tall buildings made of red sand and glass emerging from the black rocks. Ophiataurus sat, waiting, as he had done for centuries before. Waiting and waiting until they inevitably slipped up. It was exactly 1756 earth years since he first learned of the guardians of earth that he finally got what he was looking for. An opening. 

He saw it, from miles away. He watched the sky opening, saw the being falling to the ground and smiled. He turned to Lilith who too wore a smile, if only slightly hesitant.

“She’s with some of the strongest people on that planet now,” Lilith mused, watching the scene of Y/N interacting with the Avengers with her head cocked. Ophiataurus didn’t even blink, leaning back in his chair.

“It matters not who she’s with now,” his voice boomed across the room, “It matters that by next month, she will be ours.”

-

They hadn’t lowered their weapons. Despite her best attempt at a comforting smile and her relaxed posture, they remained on guard. Maybe they should have been, it was only instinct. But these were people Y/N knew all too well, and most of them had made her job a hell of a lot easier (arguably a hell of a lot harder too). So, she was slightly pissed when they refused to lower the gun.

“I’m really not going to hurt you,” she sighed again for the fifth time, dropping her hands from their outstretched position. They watched as she shook her head, hair falling around her face like waves, and then she got nearer. Natasha glanced at Steve from the corner of her eye and both moved with the unknown woman, adjusting their stance to better their advantage over her. 

Y/N smiled at that. There wasn’t a single person she couldn’t take out with her pinky finger if she wanted to. But she wasn’t going to do that now. Instead, she moved towards the end of the table, where bowls of food were still gathered, and picked up a plate. The team watched in awe as she spooned quinoa and watermelon slices onto a plate, poured herself a large and overzealous glass of wine, and then jumped almost effortlessly onto counter behind her. 

“If you’re going to hold me hostage with your primitive weapons, at least let me eat your rabbit food,” she held up a forkful of quinoa, frowning at it before slipping it between her lips.

“Who are you?” Clint finally asked, lowering the butter knife he was poised to throw. Y/N smiled at him gratefully, taking a gulp of wine.

“Bird brain asking the real questions over here,” she pointed to him with the fork and watched Natasha and Tony twitch a little on their weapons, thinking her a threat. She lowered the fork, mentally telling herself not to wave around cutlery when a group of super paranoid superheroes were holding weapons on her. 

“My name is Y/N,” she smiled, and the group frowned.

“Okay, Y/N, what are you? And what are you doing here?” Tony thought back to her weird behaviour earlier – her feather light weight, her glowing skin, her ability to escape those ties. 

Y/N shovelled a couple more forkfuls of quinoa into her mouth, swallowed another two gulps of wine, and then set both her plate and glass aside. She cracked her neck, as if preparing for something, and then shrugged her jacket from her shoulders. The team took in more of her dress then, the elegant flowing fabric looking softer than silk, and noted that her skin was still sparkling, even without the glow of the sun.

“Ready, fellas?” She winked and revelled in the slightly terrified expression Steve held. With little effort at all, she let her wings grow, long and soft looking feathers cascading from her back. They stretched upwards, a good two feet above her head, and curved slightly. The feathers were whiter than snow, glistening slightly with specks of gold. 

Maybe it was the shock, or maybe it was the idea of killing what could only be described as an angel, but the team’s grip on their weapons faltered – Nat and Steve’s only momentarily, but others like Tony and Clint dropped them completely. Bruce walked around the table, too intrigued not to get a little closer now, and frowned at the woman’s back. 

“They’re-“

“Wings, yes,” Y/N cut him off with the roll of her eyes. She fluttered them a little, the soft brushing of feathers almost musical, and then lifted them a little, out of the way. “I’m a guardian angel.” 

A silence fell over the team as they processed her words and she tried to be patient, but honestly, they weren’t getting up to speed as fast as she’d like.

“Okay, people, I am a guardian angel, more specifically, his guardian angel,” she pointed a long fingernail at Bucky who spluttered on air as the team turned to look at him. Y/N didn’t stop though, continuing her quick explanation, “I’m from a secret realm up there,” she pointed to the sky, “and my job wasn’t exactly getting any easier trying to steer this fuck head out of danger from up there, so I was sent down here to protect him on earth.” 

“You’re my guardian angel?” Bucky cut through the silence that followed, and Y/N groaned. 

“Yes, keep up,” she muttered, moving around the table and grabbing a half-eaten hot dog from Bucky’s plate. She bit into it and smiled, laying a hand on his shoulder. “Sometimes, I swear, you’re slower than George R. R. Martin writing that goddamn Winds of Winter.”

Sam let out a loud guffaw of laughter, shaking his head, before he opened his mouth to make an insult, the word “asshole” slipping from his tongue. Y/N saw it coming a mile off and smirked, pulling a gun from beneath her dress and holding it towards Sam’s face as she bit into the hot dog again. The team were on guard again immediately and pulled all their weapons on her, making her roll her eyes again. She spun the gun on her finger, holding it and her hot dog up in the air, before she placed it on the table.

“No one gets to call this asshole an asshole but me okay,” she ruffled Bucky’s hair and he flinched a little, tensing up. His head spun with questions, but he settled on one, turning to look this angel in the eyes. Her playful expressions softened when his eyes met hers and she put her hot dog down too, trying to reach out to him only for him to pull away.

“You’ve been my guardian angel for the entire time?” He murmured, frown set on his forehead. Y/N smiled sadly, fingers running over her dress nervously.

“Since March 10th, 1917, Bucky boy,” her voice was smooth as satin and Bucky tried not to let it sway him. When he turned away from her, he saw his past, flashing before his eyes like a horror movie and abruptly stood, glancing around the table, his eyes never settling on one person.

“I need to clear my head.”

Y/N would have gone after him, she swore it. But she knew what he needed. She always knew what he needed. So, even if she wanted to spend all the time in the world with him, reminiscing, she knew he needed time to think this over. She sighed, watching him leave, before she slid into his now unoccupied seat, a more sombre expression on her face.

“Where did you get that gun from?” Tony spluttered out, staring at the gold gun that now lay across the beautifully arranged barbecue spread. Y/N shrugged, wiping her hand across in a sweeping motion. The team watched as the once solid gun now disintegrated into what looked like stardust, blowing away in the wind.

“Are you immortal?” Clint asked next, and she explained that she was and that even if she wanted to die, it was practically impossible to kill her.

“How impossible?” Bruce frowned.

“You have to launch me into the heart of a dying star so, I’d say pretty damn impossible, green giant,” she reached over the table for the wine bottle, glancing around for an empty glass. When she saw none, she shrugged and took a chug directly from the bottle.

“So,” Tony wore an expression which could only be described as that which promised a huge philosophical announcement. Y/N, leaned forward, genuinely intrigued by what he had to ask, “if anything goes wrong in our life, we have someone up there to blame?” 

Y/N quirked an eyebrow at him for a second and he stared her down, his own eyebrow raised and a smirk playing on his lips as though he had just won a game of chess. She scoffed at the notion and leant back in her chair.

“We guide humans down what we believe to be the right path. Now, some guardians take that literally and guide their humans down what they believe to be the right path for their humans, not necessarily the right path for everyone. Sometimes, these right paths clash and lead humans in a different direction. But most of all, humans rarely actually listen to their guardians or,” she hesitated, raising her hands to make air quotes, “their ’conscience’ and so we’re up there telling you to be a good person, and you go along and fuck it all up. So, no, you can’t blame your angel for everything, Stark. Especially not that goddamn beard.” 

A chorus of oohs filled the space as they all turned to a slightly blushing Stark, who was definitely glaring at Y/N now. Steve pondered for a second and then turned to her, his weapon still in his hand but no longer pointed at her, instead resting on the table.

“So when Buck was in Siberia and-“

“I don’t want to talk about that,” she flinched away, remembering the memories, but Steve and a couple of others caught the look in her eyes too well. It was a look they all held from time to time – guilt, fear and a sea of pain. 

Thankfully, Sam was the one to change the subject, and the night continued with Y/N answering their often slightly strange questions. She refused to give them any indication as to who their guardian angels were and whether they were nice or not, the only hint being that they were all Avengers now so surely they must be doing something right? 

Steve occasionally asked a more personal question, and she tried to keep her guard up. It was the only time they noticed that this sarcastic and bubbly front was exactly that – a front. When she was hiding her true feelings, her answers shorter and snappier, eyes never really meeting anyone else’s, they knew she had been through a lot. 

“Well, I guess if you’re here to protect Bucky, we have to make you a part of the team?” Tony said, the sky now completely pitch black and the team sufficiently tipsy from the couple of hours they’d spent talking and grilling the angel. She shrugged, a small smile on her lips.

“Well, I ain’t going anywhere else so…” She trailed off, looking at a slightly dubious Steve. The rest of the group turned their heads to him too, as if the captain would have the final word on this. He hesitated for a while. He wasn’t entirely sure if he could trust her with the rest of the team – sure she was Bucky’s guardian, but what about the others? He was also not entirely sure he liked her. She seemed to take a nonchalant approach to Bucky’s life and he wasn’t sure if that was the reason he had been through some of the stuff he’d been through. 

But over the night, he’d watched her carefully when she answered something personal, and he saw then that there was more to her than she was letting on. It was a gamble, sure, not knowing if that something more was good or bad. But the general feel of her was good and after all, if they were to believe what she had told them, she was an angel so…

“Welcome to the team,” Steve stood, hand outstretched. Y/N shot him a wide and genuine smile, perhaps the most genuine thing he’d seen her do and stood too, taking his hand in hers.

“Thank you, Stevie,” she smiled again, leaning forward so only he could hear her next words. “I promise you, if I have anything to do with it, nothing bad will ever happen to him again.” 

-

They gave her a spare room, right next door to Bucky (given he had been the last one to move to the compound). She heard him in his room – the soft sounds of music playing from a vinyl player she remembered Nat had gifted him, and she smiled, leaning against the wall the separated the two of them.

She sensed distrust from him. It hurt her more than she cared to admit, and she’d disguised that with her intense sarcasm, as usual. It was hard wrapping her head around the fact that she knew him so well – better than he knew himself – and yet, he knew absolutely nothing about her. At first, she had been irritated that he hadn’t immediately welcomed her into his arms or spent time to get to know her like the others. But when she realised she couldn’t expect that from a man that considered her a practical stranger, she held back. 

Looking around the bare room, she frowned. She envisaged exactly what she wanted – different to her stark white and gold accented room in the realm, now that she could have that – and smiled. With one sweep of her arm, all the items she desired materialised, covering the worlds with posters she wanted, her bed with bedding of her favourite colours and little accessories that added more personality. 

Smiling wider at her handiwork, she stood, making her way to her bed. There was a knock on her door shortly after and using her powers, Y/N clicked the door open.

“You know you can just ask FRIDAY to do that for you,” Steve said as he stepped into the room and noticed the sweeping gesture she’d made with her arm. He held bed linen and towels in his arms, which he realised were rendered useless when he noted she’d taken care of the interiors already. He frowned, shaking his head with an amused and baffled smile. Y/N smiled sympathetically and stood, moving over to where Steve was standing. 

“I didn’t get around to the bathroom yet,” she took the towels from the pile and Steve set the useless bed linens on the dresser to his right. He scratched the back of his head and looked around the room.

“This what your room looked like up there?” He asked and Y/N laughed shaking her head.

“The realm has a very strict aesthetic. I only managed to get this jacket because I’ve been alive and kicking for so long and Anthony – my boss – felt a little guilty,” she held up the white leather she had been wearing earlier and Steve cocked his head.

“Do you still have to wear that dress?” He mused and she looked down at it, lifting the material and letting it run through her fingers.

“I guess not,” she smoothed her hand across it and it transformed swiftly into a pair of leggings and a hoodie, the transformation surrounded by disappearing golden glitter. Steve smirked when he read the print on the hoodie.

‘This angel ain’t afraid to get her halo dirty’. 

“He’ll talk soon,” Steve rocked back and forwards on his heels, hands in pockets. He wasn’t sure why he was trying to sooth her but he thought it had something to do with the fact that she seemed to be the only person that had known him then and now. And maybe she had more answers to who he’d been in between. Y/N sensed this and smiled, resting a hand on his shoulder.

“I know,” she murmured. “I know him. He’ll talk when he’s ready.”

Sleep didn’t come easy. She joked to herself, and later to Nat in the kitchen, that it was jet lag. But really it was that she had been so used to falling asleep when Bucky did – if he did – that she never really had to think about doing it when she wanted. Especially now that she no longer knew if Bucky was asleep.

Instead she lay awake in her bed, in complete bafflement as to how she was possibly going to be able to do this now that she didn’t constantly have an eye on him. This thought scared her even more when she heard a loud scream from the other side of the wall. A nightmare. Back in the realm, she had been awoken in her room whenever Bucky had one and was left working remotely – trying desperately to guide him to some form of comfort so he could sleep again. Sometimes it would work. Sometimes it wouldn’t, and she would be left groggily making her way to the office to continue her daily work there. 

It was a reflex then, that she rose from her bed and ran to him. Using all of her powers to override compound locks and FRIDAYs programming to get to him. She crouched by his bed, watching him thrash against his sheets, eyes squeezed shut. 

“Bucky,” she whispered, hesitating before she reached out and lay a soothing hand on his arm. He instantly stilled at the touch, her powers running through his system to wake him. The bad memories remained, she couldn’t remove them, but they played alongside good ones – some that he had never even remembered before. He gasped, squeezing his eyes shut again to stop the tears. 

“Bucky,” her voice made him jerk away, a reminder of all of it. The good and the bad.

“It’s your fault,” he grumbled, kicking his legs over the other side of the bed, his back to her, scarred and sweaty. She flinched at his words, sitting back on her feet.

“Please…” she whispered, wanting nothing more for him to be close to her again. But he stayed the other side of the bed, hands running through his hair. 

“Why did you let that happen?” Bucky’s voice was shaky as he remembered it all – the killing, the torture, the pain. It all flooded his memory and she had let it happen. She let it all happen. She could not be a guardian angel. She had to be the devil.

“I… I wasn-“

“Get out,” Bucky growled, his voice final. She wanted to argue with him. She wanted to tell him how it made her feel to experience all that too. She wanted to explain. But she realised that that was not her job. Her job was to protect him, not to make him understand. Right now, protecting him was giving him space. So she stood, and left the room despite the tears in her eyes.


	4. Chapter 4

They got the call two weeks after Y/N had moved into the compound. Tony had been vague on the phone to Steve but promised that the mission was of the upmost importance and more would be discussed when he arrived there in two hours. 

Life on the compound had continued on as normal. At least it seemed to. There were still smaller missions on which the more experienced Avengers went on. Tony was rarely actually there and when he was it was for an hour or so, just to check in or to prep for a mission he was required to attend to. Things were steady.

Y/N got to know everyone – or, more accurately, they got to know here, as it seemed she knew an abnormal amount about the team already, often things they didn’t even know about themselves. 

She always tried to act like she didn’t, listening to their story as if she hadn’t watched it play out from above, but she let things slip. Like how she nonchalantly asked Clint how Lila’s first day at Elementary School had been despite him never really mentioning his kids age or any particular milestones around the others. Or how she mentioned the exact brand of Tony’s sleeping medication when she comforted him after he admitted he’d had a bad night’s sleep, a detail only himself and Pepper knew. 

Bucky avoided her like the plague. He had wrapped his head around a lot of things over the past few months, years, decades. He’d wrapped his head around the changes in technology. He’d wrapped his head around his new arm. He’d wrapped his head around living in a compound with the world’s greatest superheroes. But Y/N, he couldn’t even begin to understand. 

There was a connection there, and whenever she was in the room, he felt a pull towards her. Like he was supposed to be by her side. He found her attractive, but then again, who didn’t? She was an angel. The smile she reserved only for him – to comfort him, did exactly that for a little while. It instilled a sense of protection and he felt loved and warm. 

And yet he always forced himself to turn away and avoid getting close to her. He wasn’t sure if this was a trick or something and with every good memory he could possibly remember, with it came the bad. And in the centre of it all was now you. 

His reaction worried both Y/N and Steve and the two of them often discussed it, perhaps one of the few times Y/N was ever really honest with anyone on the team.

“I’m scared it’s hindering his progress,” Steve murmured as the two of them sat on Y/N’s bed. Bucky had had a nightmare and she’d rushed to his side as usual, his pain making her own heart ache. He’d woken up as he usually did, relaxed into her touch and even reached out to hold her. But then he remembered it all, and he shot out of bed, screaming at her to get the hell out and leave him the fuck alone. 

She’d done as he asked, tears in her eyes but with little protest, and had ran into Steve in the hall. He’d sighed, smoothing his hands over her arms, telling her to wait for him in her room and he’d be there after calming Bucky down.

“I… I’d leave but…” her heart broke just saying the words. Her only purpose was to protect him. She wanted nothing else. How could she leave and be something she wasn’t? She had to be here. Steve understood and even though it pained him to see Bucky deteriorating little by little, he knew she wasn’t responsible for the bad in his life. He desperately wanted Bucky to understand that too.

“Can’t you explain to him. Make him understand?” Steve lowered his head into his hands, knotting his fingers in his hair. Y/N sighed, feeling the tension radiating off him as she ran a hand over his back, her touch and powers instantly soothing Steve. 

“I can’t do that, Steve. I have to give him time.”

-

When Tony arrived, they were all gathered in the conference room. Bucky had arrived last and had reluctantly taken a seat directly opposite Y/N, avoiding her gaze. Y/N shut her eyes, faltering for a second before she smiled brightly at the team.

“What’s this about huh? Ooh do you reckon he finally knocked Pepper up?” She leaned over the table, balancing her head on her hand as she twirled a gold handled knife in the other. Steve snatched the knife from her, only for it to disintegrate into dust in his hand. He tutted and shook his head.

“Do you have to put it like that?” Bucky snapped at her and her façade faltered slightly, turning to him. She considered being soft, apologising instantly and begging for forgiveness, but she knew that wouldn’t help. 

“Not used to it?” She smirked, leaning even further over the table to smirk at him. Bucky faltered too, glancing down at her cleavage, his eyes softening. Y/N smirked again, “I’d be quite happy to show you how it’s done but-“

“Hey, hey,” Steve pulled her back and shot her a glare, Bucky instantly turning to the front of the room, his jaw clenching and unclenching as he tried to sift through the thoughts running through his head. 

“Morning,” Tony pushed open the door, stepping through the slightly awkward tension with a frown. “Little frosty, but okay… We have a mission. And I need everyone in on it.”

“Everyone?” Steve frowned, leaning forward as Tony stood at the head of the table. He wasn’t one for sitting. When Tony nodded, both Steve and Y/N glanced nervously at Bucky who ignored their worried looks. 

“We have intel that Hydra are experimenting on imprisoned S.H.I.E.L.D. agents. Fury says five agents have gone missing around this area,” he brought up a map highlighted with a red circle onto the display in the centre of the table. Both Y/N and Bucky’s eyes widened at the sight of it and Y/N felt a lump in her throat.

“That’s…” she pointed at it, glancing at Bucky who locked his jaw and turned to Tony. Tony was already looking at him.

“We know there must be a base there somewhere, but… we need co-ordinates,” Tony explained. 

“There,” everyone turned to see Y/N already leaning over the table, her finger drawing a small square in what appeared to be a forest on the display. “The base is there.”

“You’d fucking know, wouldn’t you?” Bucky growled, and Y/N swallowed, flinching at his tone. The memories of what they had done to Bucky there flooded her mind and she clenched her fists.

“I’m coming with you,” she announced, turning to Tony. Bucky scoffed, standing and slamming both hands on the table, leaning over to get in her face.

“I’m not going there with you.” 

“You’re not going there without me,” Y/N stood her ground, folding her arms. A dust surrounded her and her casual t-shirt and jeans were replaced with white and gold armour, no apparent weapons on her. “It’s my job to protect you Bucky, whether you like it or not.”

“She’s coming, Buck.” Steve stood too, reaching over to lay a hand on his shoulder. “She might remember things you don’t.”

Bucky stared in disbelief at his best friend, turning to Y/N with hurt in his eyes before he shrugged Steve’s arm from his shoulder, stalking towards the door.

“Whatever,” he muttered, slamming the door shut behind him. Steve sighed and watched as Y/N chewed her lip, nervously watching him stalk towards the uniform room through the glass walls of the conference room. 

“Alright guys,” he nodded at Y/N and then the rest of the team. “Suit up and meet on the jet in half-an-hour.”

-

On the way to the bases location, somewhere in the Philippines, Bucky tried to clue the team in on as much as he could remember of the base. Y/N let him say what he knew, and whenever he struggled to remember something, she’d interject as softly as possible and fill in the blanks. Yet, no matter what the intentions were, each time she spoke, it was a slap in the face for Bucky – another bad memory and another reminder of her betrayal. 

Once Tony had finally got all the information the team needed, the experience painful for everyone, Steve pulled Y/N away from Bucky before anything could get worse. She didn’t even protest when Steve’s hand wrapped around her elbow and was even relieved herself to be away from that situation. It was hard enough that she had to live with those memories herself, but with each look of disgust and pain from Bucky, it made it even harder for her to overcome the guilt she had tried so desperately to avoid. 

Bucky focused on getting his weapons in order, sliding different shaped knives with distinctive blade edges into the various pockets on his custom-made uniform. Steve moved Y/N to the front of the jet, hovering over Clint as he flew them towards their destination.

“Are you not going to get any equipment?” Steve focused on the sky ahead of them but gestured vaguely to the lockers that held a wide array of weaponry. Y/N smiled and shook her head, playing with her powers and crafting a few weapons out of practice, only for them to disintegrate back into stardust the second they were fully materialised. 

“I think I got that covered,” she shrugged, and Clint scoffed, watching a spear disappear before his eyes.

“I liked that one,” he murmured, and Y/N grinned at him, tapping him on the shoulder.

“I’ll bring it out on the field just for you, Robin Hood,” she playfully lay a kiss on his temple, which he wafted away. 

“Yeah, yeah,” he blushed a little and turned to Tony, “Hey you finished compiling that data for us? We’re coming up to ten minutes away.” 

Tony swiped a few things on his tablet in his hand, blue shapes flying off the screen like he was pushing cards off a table. He tapped twice and smiled as a small beep emitted from each of the teams’ own devices. 

“Sent it all your way,” Tony threw his tablet onto the bench beside him and kicked his legs up, watching with satisfaction as Natasha, Steve, Wanda, Sam and Bruce all examined their tablets to absorb the information. His satisfied look faltered however when he saw the slightly pitiful glances they shot Bucky’s way, realising they were all now learning exactly the torture he’d been through. Y/N held her breath as she watched Steve scan over the information. He glanced at Bucky too, his back turned to the team as he selected ammo, and then he glanced at her.

“I’m sorry,” Steve whispered, reaching out and placing a hand on his shoulder. Y/N flinched under his touch, closing off from any sympathy he was willing to give her. She struggled to find a response, words falling dead on her tongue, and so instead she moved quickly to the back of the ship, sitting alone and far from the group with her head turned to the ground.

It was dead silent for the remainder of the journey and Bucky tried his best not to glance over at her sat at the far side of the jet. He couldn’t figure out if it was guilt in her expression or pain or a mix of both. It hurt him more that he felt pity for her. That he saw himself in her and it hurt him too. But he forced himself to remember why he was blanking her and didn’t look at her again.

Clint parked the jet a couple of miles off from the base, wanting the element of surprise to be on their side. They walked towards the base in silence again, except this time it wasn’t awkward. Everyone was too focused on the task at hand now, weapons poised for attack and eyes darting around the forest around them, not necessarily on each other. 

The first shot was fired at Steve, who blocked it instantly with his shield, and then the fight really began. Steve fired instructions down the coms, assigning each team member with a section and group of enemy agents to focus their attack on. 

They did as instructing, assisting where necessary, but everyone was more than capable on their own. With each attack, they progressed closer and closer to the base, defeating more and more opponents. Bucky, given his relative ease with combat and multi-tasking, kept one eye on the person he was disarming and her. 

Y/N was an elegant fighter and where Natasha’s fighting seemed almost effortless, Y/N’s lacked the aggression hers sometimes held, making it seem more like a dance than combat. She moved gracefully through the air, using both hand-on-hand combat moves and weapons to progress through her section. 

Hydra stood no chance against her, Bucky could see that clearly. She knew their movements even before they themselves knew them and she was advancing quicker than anyone else on the field, Steve not far behind her. 

Bucky knew then that she had an ulterior motive. He wasn’t sure what it was but when he encountered a few difficulties with a team of agents at the door he shot a worried glance to Steve who gave him a reassuring nod. He noticed it too.

“Y/N,” Steve disarmed an agent, lifting his knee to connect to the man’s nose and knocking him to the ground. Y/N had ripped the door off its hinges and was stalking inside, leaving Steve to chase after her. His hand wrapped around her bicep and tugged hard despite her protest. When she turned to look at him there was a fire in her eyes that had him frightened for his life. “What are you doing?”

Y/N’s eyes softened when she noted his fear and she relaxed her stance, squeezing her eyes shut for a second to cool her boiling blood and regain control over her emotions. 

“I know who’s here. Who’s running this facility. I can’t…” her tone got angrier and angrier and she trailed off before she lost it again, clenching her fists as she materialised two guns between her fingers. 

“You should have shared that information with us,” Steve was angry, understandably, but Y/N ignored him, turning on her heel again and disappearing down a corridor. “This is my fight, Rogers.”

Steve was stunned into his spot on the floor for a second, before he was running after her once again, watching a white and gold blur manoeuvre around gloomy corridors like a candle in the dark. He called out her name repeatedly, but she ignored him, kicking down another door until she was face to face with him.

“You,” she snarled, Steve watching as she crossed the room in two strides. Her hand flew to the man’s throat, lifting him in the air and walking him back until he was slammed against the wall with such force that the plaster around him crumbled. He just smiled though, fingers grasping at hers around his neck.

She couldn’t separate him from the images in her mind. He had aged, obviously, wrinkles lining his once smooth face, but he was still the man that had bound Bucky up with leather and chains, filling his blood with chemical after chemical that altered his brain structure and consequently, her ability to get through to him.

“I’ve been wanting to kill you for forty-six years, Sodrov,” Y/N lifted her free hand, a gold gun pressing to the man’s temple. 

“Y/N, stop, you can’t kill him,” Steve tried to reason, his hand firm on her shoulder. She used her power to force him off, the effect sending Steve flying across the room, his back colliding with the wall with a painful crash. 

“I’m no fucking angel anymore, I can do what I want,” Y/N spat in Sodrov’s face, grip tightening on his neck. He only smiled wider, gasping and breathy laughs tumbling from his restricted throat.

“They’re coming,” he scratched out, his Russian accent thick. Y/N knew who he was talking about immediately and out of fear, her fingers tightened even more. She ignored the snarl of anger coming from Bucky in the doorway as he crouched over Steve, watching Y/N choke the life out of someone with little regard for Steve’s wellbeing. 

Sodrov smiled wider, closing his eyes as Y/N’s widened as she realised what was coming. Sodrov forced open his eyes once more, eyes fixing onto Y/N’s as the life drained from his own.

“And none of you will be prepared when you arrive.”


	5. Chapter 5

The team set up base in an old S.H.I.E.L.D facility where Fury was waiting. He stood, cross armed beside Maria Hill, staring down Steve as he approached with an unknown woman by his side. The room was large and concrete with pillars of metal used as support. Before them, there were three floors of glass windows, looking into what seemed like conference rooms, control desks and private offices.

“I gave you strict instructions not to recruit new personnel without my knowledge, Rogers,” Fury glanced at Bucky and Y/N remembered the time when Steve had almost had to physically fight Nick Fury to allow Bucky to stay in the compound and become an Avenger. Of course, Bucky did not know about this. 

“I don’t think you want to question her place here, sir,” Steve said, nodding at Fury. Fury was wary – it was his nature not to trust – but he acknowledged Steve’s trust and given that she had clearly assisted them in bringing Sodrov into custody in some way, she couldn’t be all bad. 

“You take him to a holding cell,” Steve nodded to Clint and Natasha who were carrying Sodrov on a stretcher. Then he turned to Sam who stepped forward to receive a command. “You take care of her, make sure she stays in sight.” He glanced at you with narrowed eyes and she huffed.

“You’re acting like I’m going to kill you all,” she grumbled, still twirling a knife around her fingers. Steve snatched out for it but it disintegrated again and Fury raised an eyebrow. Useful. 

“Yeah, well, you went against orders. It’s not us I’m worried about getting killed, it’s him,” Steve pointed after Clint and Natasha before moving to Bucky. Bucky had tried to remain calm throughout this whole situation, practicing breathing techniques. He had so much anger in him he didn’t know who to direct it to – Sodrov or Y/N – so when Steve laid a hand on Bucky’s shoulder, he jerked away and glared. 

“We need to talk about Y/N. She’s not going to do it herself,” Steve looked after you as you pushed Sam playfully into a pillar and threw your head back in a melodic laugh that Bucky so desperately want to smile at. Steve shook his head and sighed, “not properly at least.”

“What is there to know?” Bucky turned and spat with more venom than intended. Steve pursed his lip before taking a seat in one of the uncomfortable chairs. Bucky stood before him, stood feed apart with his arms crossed. “I’m sick of it Steve. You guys acting like we need her, she ruined my life! How could you keep someone like that around?” Bucky’s voice grew louder and louder and the panic grew in his eyes. Was this all a trap? Was it Hydra again? 

He crouched on the floor and steadied his breathing. Steve just watched, waiting patiently.

“You can’t blame her for that, Buck,” Steve said after a while, but Bucky just scoffed. He stood again, turning his back to his best friend. 

“Why the hell not, Steve? She claims to have guided me through life. How could she guide me to that? Through that?” Bucky squeezed his eyes shut and ran his hand across his face. The thoughts swam and swam until one thought got louder and louder. He let out a frustrated grunt, shrugging off his tactical jacket and throwing it across the room. Before Steve could stop him, he was stalking across the room with long slides, an intent look in his eyes Steve knew all too well.

Steve stood, reaching out to his friend, “Buck where are you-“

“-she can explain this to me. I’m fucking sick of it.” 

Steve let him leave, watching as he shoved the door you’d gone through open and yelling at Sam to get out. Sam barked back some sarcastic reply, only to come jogging out of the room when Bucky turned his eyes on him, full of rage. 

“What’s your problem?” Y/N stood defiantly as Bucky set his murderous gaze to her. The room they were in was small and had no windows. It seemed to be an interrogation room, holding only a desk, three chairs and a mirror both of them assumed to be a one-way mirror. He stared at her for a moment, in disbelief before turning and slamming the door shut behind him. 

“What’s my problem? Are you serious? You know my problem very well, sweetheart.” He stepped closer, getting into her face but she still didn’t back down. She was worried, not scared. Worried he’d do something he’d regret. Worried he was getting pushed backwards. She was not afraid of being hurt.

“I do, Bucky, but does that mean you have to get like this every damn time we’re near each other?” She sighed, shaking her head and averting her eyes. She wanted him to understand. All she wanted was for him to understand. But, how could he?

“Yes. Yes. You know why? Because I don’t fucking understand you. I don’t understand why you would torture me like that and then bring me back here. Why you would cause me nearly seventy years of excruciating pain and then send me to Wakanda, or Steve or whatever,” he was practically screaming at her, but she never flinched, watching the anguish overcome his expression until he was crying. She bit back her own tears, standing her ground despite his continued outburst, “Is it some sadistic joke, huh? You like watching me suffer?”

Y/N snapped then, shoving Bucky hard until he crashed against the wall behind him. She didn’t hold back, from anything, the tears falling down her face like it was rain. She felt it bubble up inside her, like it had been a steady fizz beneath the surface before, but now, like a volcano, she was ready to erupt and let it all out.

“You think it was easy being your Guardian Angel Bucky? Do you think I enjoyed watching as you lost control of your damn mind? I sat there for sixty years, terrified of the days they’d take you off ice. Terrified because I knew the minute they sat you in the chair and said those words, I would lose the ability to guide you. And I’d just have to watch as you did it all.” She screamed at him, knowing the compound could probably hear her right now, but she didn’t care. Her skin glowed brighter as she approached, her anger fuelling a power in her she never knew she could ignite, but it sent Bucky both cowering in fear and inching closer. She noticed his expression softening but she didn’t stop, stepping until she was righting in front of him again. 

“My job was to protect you. To make you the best human being possible. And they took that job from me.” She pushed him so he was pressed against the wall, the power coursing through her fingertips sending a wave of pressure through him that had I’m gasping, like he was being held underwater. 

It was like someone had opened the flood gates, there was no stopping the tidal wave of emotion she was letting out. Fifty years of feeling, masked by sarcasm and wit, was finally being unearthed and there was seemingly no end as Bucky watched her face contort into the familiar expression of agony. 

“You think you’re the only one that had nightmares? I had to live knowing I wasn’t strong enough to fight them and not only did I have to live with my suffering, but I had sit up there every fucking day and watch the love of my life break into smaller and smaller pieces. I had to watch the man I love be picked apart and thrown around like a goddamn rag doll.” She sobbed, hand raising to her mouth to muffle the sound. “I tried every day to help you and everyone up there told me to quit – to leave it for someone else to try and fix. I knew what they were saying. That I wasn’t strong enough to help you but… I coul-couldn’t let you go.” 

Bucky didn’t know why he held his arms out, but when she fell into them, fists clutching at the material of his shirt, he felt awash with relief. He squeezed his eyes shut, burying his face in her hair as she rested her forehead on his chest, the sobs ripping through her like a jagged knife. 

He didn’t know how long he held her, but when her sobs became less violent and her fists relaxed, she stepped back. He looked at her, dead in the eyes and reached out for her again, hand on her cheek. Y/N’s eyelids shut softly, relaxing into the warmth of his touch.

Bucky found the bad thoughts of her washing away with her confession and then, as the intensity of the hate he felt disappeared, he realised the intensity of the attraction that had laid there, masked by the pain and hurt. A part of him wanted to hold back, think it over. But a bigger part of him told there was not thinking needed. This feeling was all that mattered. She was no longer the cause of his suffering, but an equal in suffering. He had someone who understood.

“Love of your life?” Bucky whispered, stepping closer so they were only inches apart. Y/N’s eyes shot open again, wide with fear as she remembered what she had said. She scoffed to disguise her embarrassment, looking at the floor.

“Don’t get too big headed, there are lots of girls out there that thought you were the love of their life,” she muttered, and Bucky smiled.

“How’s that supposed to make me less big headed?” He teased, thumb running across her cheekbone. Y/N scoffed again, shaking her head with a smile on her face.

“Most of them are dead or in their nineties now, Buck,” she retorted, earning a sharp inhale of breath from the man. She cringed a little, but relaxed when she saw his eyes holding a playful glint.

“Too soon?” 

“I mean it’s been fifty years so…”

Both of them laughed until a silence settled over them. 

“You were strong enough, Y/N,” he whispered, glancing down. “I… I know I blamed you, but. You got me here. And I think here is the best place I could have ended up.”

“The Philippines, face to face with an ex-torturous slave master?” She raised an eyebrow and Bucky scoffed out a laugh.

“That’s a bit unfortunate… but I’m here with friends. Steve, Sam, Tony…” he waved to the door and she sighed a sigh of relief. He turned to her again, taking a deep breath before letting his gut lead the way, “You brought me to you.”

Y/N held her breath, replaying those words over and over in her head. He was here, in front of her now, holding her and telling her he needed her. It was all she’d ever wanted. So when his thumb brushed her lips, she didn’t hesitate to wrap a hand round his neck and pull his lips to hers, kissing him as if to prove that what she’d said was true.

Bucky Barnes was the love of her life.

-

Lilith approached cautiously, sensing a tension from her master. He was stood overlooking the stars as they moved further and further into the galaxy, further and further away from Chaos.

“They’ve found him,” she stood next to him, hands clasped in front of her. Ophiataurus didn’t even look at her but she noted a flicker of disappointment in his eyes, which was followed by a heavy sigh.

“Sooner than we would have liked,” he moved to sit back in the chair. 

“We underestimated her capabilities…. Her knowledge,” Lilith stepped closer to him again, turning with her back to the galaxy. Ophiataurus looked at her then, eyes fixed with rage. Lilith tried not to cower in fear.

“You mean you underestimated her,” he growled, leaning forward. “You were one of them. You were supposed to know what her powers were. You were supposed to know exactly what she was capable of.”

“It’s been nearly two centuries, I-“

“Was I not the one who rescued you,” Ophiataurus roared, standing so he towered over the fallen angel. She backed away then, until her back was against the glass. “Was I not the one who took you in when your race banished you? When they sent you down here to rot? And what have you repaid me with? You certainly haven’t given me the key to their powers. You disappoint me.”

Lilith bit her tongue. It was true, he had found her when the realm threw her down from above, banishing her for life and stripping her of her powers. But it felt little like a rescue and more like a capture. She went from one agenda to another, and in each one, she rebelled. 

“We can make the jump, get closer. She still doesn’t know we’re coming, yet.” Lilith lied. She knew Y/N would know. She’d heard Sodrov’s final words before he’d passed out. And she’d seen Y/N’s face. She was probably preparing right now for a battle. But Lilith lied to protect herself, as she always had done.

“Fine,” Ophiataurus sat back, still not pleased with the exact order of events, but pleased enough that they would be close to Earth. And he still held the intense optimism that in no less than fourty-eight hours, the fallen angel would be his.   
 


	6. Chapter 6

It was one of those skies again. Except this time, a sunrise. No longer a darkness eating away the light. No longer gold turning to orange to black. It was reverse.

Bucky thought it was fitting this way. His life had always been the darkness eating away the gold. He watched sunsets because he related to them. The falling sun, like he had once been, disappearing until he was the darkness of the night. Until he was the black sky between the stars. 

She was tangled in his sheets, arms secured around him like tree roots twisting around a rusty bike. Through his window, the sun was rising, first only slightly. The sky a dim blue – like jeans, now tinted orange and pink by the sun rising beneath the horizon, the clouds defined by golden edges and red crevices. 

And then, like her, the sun rose. Golden and bright and full of promise. Full of life and protection. It was all her. When the sun caught her skin, the stardust sparkled as bright as the sun outside, so much so that Bucky was sure that if someone told him the earth revolved around her, he wouldn’t even question it. He was already convinced. 

He traced over Y/N’s skin, watching the light radiating from her dance between his fingers. She stirred and he stilled, watching her shift and curl around him even more. He let out a breath and her eyes opened, fluttering and steady until they were half open. She looked up at him, bleary eyed and hazy, but when her eyes met his, she smiled, lips curling slightly until her eyes were shut again.

“Morning, handsome,” she mumbled, her sleepy voice sounding fifteen times more angelic than her usual voice. It had Bucky rendered silent, his only reaction being to lean down and press his lips to hers, fingers wrapping softly around her arms until she was fully embraced by him, close and warm.

“To think,” she murmured against his lips and Bucky felt the smirk there despite his closed eyes, “twenty-four hours ago you were ready to kill me.”

“I was never ready to kill you,” Bucky said softly, opening his eyes and moving his hands to cup her face. Y/N relished in the feel of metal and flesh against her skin, smiling when she felt the fingers of the metal arm heat up to mimic body temperature.

“I was always conflicted. I just felt like to me, you were… it’s like you were,” he struggled to find the words, throwing his head back on to the soft pillow behind his head. He took a deep breath, trying to settle on an analogy, “the instant you came into my life, you were the world to me. But… my world isn’t always good and so… you were the good and the bad.”

She watched him intently trying to explain, not once moving to butt in. 

“I loved you so much, from the moment I laid eyes on you. But I didn’t understand how I… how I could love you and blame you at the same time.”

“Do you still blame me?” She whispered, watching as his eyes grew sad. Y/N smiled knowingly too. “Don’t worry, I still blame me too. It’s… It’s an irritatingly human trait to be self-deprecating.”

Bucky scoffed out a gentle laugh, the vibrations of his chest beneath her causing her smile to widen, a melodic giggle escaping her lips. 

“You make me feel safe,” he whispered once the two of them had settled again. 

“You make me feel safe too, Bucky,” she murmured. “You’re all that I am. You’re… you’re the reason there’s still a little angel left.” As she spoke, she rolled so she was fully on her stomach, rolling her back so the wings appeared again, shading them and yet casting a golden glow over the two of them, Bucky smiled, fingers running over the feathers until they were sliding across her skin again.

“No,” he shook his head, running his fingers through her hair and placing a gentle kiss on her collar bone, “No, you’re all angel.”

-

“Phillip Sodrov,” Fury placed a file down in front of Y/N, Bucky and Steve, Natasha hovering behind them as Clint sat across the room, trusting the others to fill him in as they go. Y/N glanced at the photo of Sodrov taken in the eighties and reached over to wrap a hand around Bucky’s now tensed arm, her touch relaxing him instantly even without her healing powers. 

“High level operative for Hydra. Key in the… in the Winter Soldier programme,” Natasha trailed off and Y/N focused on calming Bucky’s tension. It worked, and he moved to thread his fingers through hers, Steve smiling at the action.

“What’s the plan for the interrogation?” Clint asked, focused on Fury. Fury sighed, looking through the window where Philip sat, chained to a table with four men guarding him.

“Usual I think. We need to figure out if they really are who Y/N says they are and whether he is a viable source or has just… read too many history books,” Fury shook his head. 

“Natasha, Steve,” he turned to them and Steve stood. “You’re in first.”

The two of them moved instantly into action, discussing in low voices their plan as they exited the small viewing room and moved into the corridor. The four remaining members still behind the window moved to look through it as Nat and Steve walked in. 

They watched as the tactics failed. Even Natasha’s most convincing techniques resulted in nothing and Steve’s good cop acted had him none the less fooled.

“Why didn’t you bring that pretty little angel in to question me?” Sodrov spat out when they tried to ask him a question that resulted in only a diversion. 

“In case you didn’t notice,” Steve snapped, leaning over the table to get in Sodrov’s face. “That pretty little angel nearly snapped your neck the last time you were in a room with her.”

Y/N smirked at the memory and Bucky nudged her, giving her a disapproving look before smirking too.

“She’s his guardian angel, isn’t she?” Sodrov grinned sadistically and everyone tensed. “James Buchanan Barnes has a guardian angel,” he laughed a laugh that sent shivers down Y/N’s spine, “sure as hell didn’t seem that way when I put venom in his blood and turned his brain to Borscht.”

Steve lost it, crashing his hands down on the table so fist shape indents curved into the metal. Natasha’s hands tugged him backwards and out the door, shoving him into the room with the rest of them. Steve let out a string of curses, not focusing on anyone until his eyes fell on her. She’d reached out, laying a hand on his shoulder, letting her powers run through him until he was calm again. 

Steve squeezed his eyes shut and let out a breath, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Thank you.”

“Let me talk to him,” Y/N responded, turning to Fury. 

“I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Fury said with a scoff and the shake of his head.

“He wants me to talk to him. I know him better than anyone in this room. I can figure out a way to get him to talk,” Y/N argued, her voice level, a tactic used to deceive them into thinking she was level-headed enough to carry this through. Fury looked her over for a minute, narrowing his eyes, before turning to Bucky.

“You’re going in with her,” Fury instructed, “make him confront his past.”

Bucky just nodded, unsure as to whether he was terrified of facing this man again or whether he was thankful Fury was letting him be the one to make sure Y/N wasn’t alone in there with that monster.

The two of them left the room quietly, squeezing each other’s hands before they pushed the door open and entered the interrogation room. Sodrov’s head snapped up at the sound of heels against the floor and smirked when his eyes scanned over her, wearing a white dress and a black leather jacket he was almost sure belonged to Barnes.

“Ah, they sent you two in,” he leaned back in the chair.

“We sent ourselves in,” Y/N slid into a chair opposite him and Bucky mimicked her actions, being very careful to place his metal arm down on the table with an irritating crash. Phillip’s eyes darted to it, an intrigued smile playing on his lips.

“Ah, an upgrade,” Sodrov cocked his head at it, admiring the gold between the plating. He scoffed when Bucky clenched his fist and moved his hand under the table, pushing up on the dent Steve had left with his bare hands so the surface was now domed upwards.

“A weapon is still a weapon, Barnes, no matter who you use it on,” Sodrov shrugged, turning back to Y/N.

“You know when Lilith said you’d be enchanting, I was thinking it was just some exaggeration to get me on their side but…” he let out a low whistle and Bucky tensed. Y/N just smirked. 

“So it was Lilith that approached you,” Y/N mused, leaning forwards. “How’s the life of a fallen angel treating her?” 

“I’d say not nearly as well as it’s treating you,” Sodrov shrugged, “but she’s doing what she knows best.”

“Destroying our way of life?” 

“Seeking revenge,” Sodrov’s eyes glinted with mischief.

“And Ophiataurus?” Bucky was desperate to get the man’s eyes of her, feeling protective and afraid. Sodrov turned to look at him.

“Never met him, sounds like a stand-up guy though.”

“I assure you, he is not,” Y/N growled. “What do you think is going to happen here, scumbag? That you’re going to be magically saved when Ophiataurus comes down here and flattens this Earth, your Earth.”

Sodrov shrugged again, leaning forward. 

“The way I see it, ангел, is this is your decision now,” he growled. “You know what he wants. And you know what he’ll do to get it.”

Y/N felt anger flare up in her. She knew exactly what he wanted but she was suddenly defensive, knowing what she’d have to sacrifice. She stood, quickly producing a sword out of nothing and holding it to Sodrov’s throat. For the first time, Bucky saw fear flash through the man’s eyes and despite standing to hold her back, he couldn’t do it. 

“Where did you get that from?” Sodrov grunted, feeling the cool blade shift against his throat with each word. Bucky smirked.

“I can think of a few places,” he muttered. Sodrov tried to regain composure.

“They’re almost here. I’d say two days max. You’re running out of time, маленький ангел. You know exactly what you need to do.”

His words stirred the venom inside her even more and she pressed harder against his throat, ignoring Bucky’s words of warning as the tears streamed down her face, dropping onto the metal table with an echoing splash. 

It wasn’t until Natasha stormed through the door and wrestled her away from him did she let the sword disintegrate and fell to the floor.


	7. Chapter 7

She was hyperventilating. Hard.

It had happened occasionally in the realm. But up there, there had always been angels on hand to lay a soothing hand on her arm and she would instantly be calm again, clear of doubts and ready to tackle whatever issue had happened to trigger her anxiety.

But here there were no other angels with healing powers. Here there were just humans repeating words they didn’t know would work in an attempt to soothe her as she paced around the room. Sodrov was behind the glass, a proud smirk still stretching across his face, and each time she paced towards him, Y/N had to squeeze her eyes shut, changing direction as her breathing spiked again.

Bucky watched helplessly, unsure of whether he could approach her or not. She was muttering under her breath, a blur of words he wasn’t entirely sure was English. He glanced at Steve and Natasha occasionally and they gave him the same look of despair he was sure he held.

Nobody but Y/N knew what was going.

Suddenly though, Y/N stopped and looked directly at Bucky, into his eyes. He held her gaze, watching her expression change from one of adoration, to misery. When she looked into his eyes, she knew what she had to do. What they would all do for each other. For her. There was no other option. It was when she let out a gasping sob, crouching on the floor, Bucky instinctively ran to her side.

Not thinking, he reached out and lay a hand on her arm to soothe her, except instead of transferring comfort to her, she transferred something else to him – the feeling of defeat, the feeling of loss and the feeling of agony.

Bucky gasped in reaction, squeezing his eyes shut as the feeling rushed to his brain and linked to memories. He stumbled back, snatching his arm away from her. Y/N calmed down instantly when she heard his pain, an impulsive need to make him okay overriding her panic attack.

Slowly approaching him, she focused her energy on soothing his anguish, fingers delicately tracing over his forearm until his eyes were no longer squeezed shut, just resting closed gently. Bucky let out a relieved sigh, eyes opening and settling on hers with concern.

“Are you okay?” He asked but she ignored him.

“I’m sorry.”

Bucky just shook his head, reaching out his metal hand to rest on her cheek. She leaned into it, relishing in the coolness against her hot skin.

“Y/N… we need… we need to know what he means,” Bucky whispered, focusing on the task at hand. All he wanted to do was drag her back to her room and tell her that everything was going to be okay. That nothing was going to hurt them anymore. That they were safe.

But he knew in his heart that that was far from the truth.

Y/N sighed, nodding slowly as she stepped away to face Clint, Fury, Natasha and Steve, Bucky standing a little behind her.

“Ophiataurus is a… fan of the realm let’s say,” Y/N started. She materialised a figure out of stardust in her hands, the golden formed face of the feared leader materialising in the tiny particles. “He rules a planet called Chaos, across the galaxy, but a couple of hundred years ago, he was travelling near earth.”

The dust changed to show the galaxy, a ship hovering over Earth, suddenly the skies parted and bright stardust filtered out of the gap, disappearing to show a figure falling.

“Lilith was a guardian angel, except she was reckless. She used her powers for evil. Pure evil with no reasoning. She played with lives and thought nothing of the consequences. It greatly disturbed the balance of humanity and so… she was banished from the realm. Ophiataurus picked her up and left back to Chaos where presumably, she told him everything.” Y/N sighed as the image zoomed in on Lilith’s face – beautiful and pure, except with eyes that betrayed her disposition.

“Ophiataurus tried to use Lilith to access the realm. We, as angels, are keys to this realm. Except when Lilith was banished, she lost her powers. Ophiataurus has stayed quiet for nearly two millennia… we stopped monitoring that side of the galaxy centuries ago, I… They… We didn’t know he and Lilith were still…” Y/N trailed off, the images she had conjured up disappearing into thin air.

“So now you’re here… with all your powers… and he has the ability to…” Steve filled in the blanks. Y/N nodded sadly.

“If he captures me, he will have full access to the realm of angels,” she confirmed.

“And what would he be able to do with that access?” Fury pushed, stepping forward in an attempt to intimidate the angel. Y/N stood her ground, standing tall and confident. She knew her role in this. She wasn’t going to allow him to devalue her.

“The realm is basically a control unit for humanity. If he was to gain access to that realm… well. He’d have control of humanity. He could use them for whatever he pleases… he creates an army, he could take over the universe.”

The room was silent as they processed what she was saying, fear spread across their faces for a moment before Steve stood forward.

“Y/N, we need to brief Tony. If Sodrov is right and they are on the way, then we don’t have much time.”

Y/N nodded and followed him out of the room, ignoring the glare that Fury was burning into her scalp. As soon as she was out of earshot, Bucky stepped closer to Fury, fists clenched in frustration.

“It isn’t her fault,” he growled but Fury refused to back down. He raised an eyebrow at Bucky, folding his arms.

“No? As far as I can tell, Earth was pretty secure until someone up there sent that thing down to protect you.”

“They didn’t have a choice,” Bucky stepped even closer.

“Everyone has a choice,” Fury snapped and Bucky sucked in an angry breath. He knew what he was referring to and he was practically shaking with rage now. He clenched and unclenched his fists, channelling his anger before storming out the room, slamming the door behind him.

“You know that isn’t true,” Natasha argued with Fury, shaking her head. “He didn’t have a choice in any of that and you know it. Y/N might be what this Ophiataurus guy wants, but it isn’t her fault he wants her. This is part of the job.”

“Maybe,” Fury shrugged. “But why did everyone up there take their eye off the ball.”  
Clint scoffed stepping towards the door with a shake of his head.

“Perhaps for the last two millennia, humanity has been problem enough for Earth.”

-

Tony was instantly anxious about the whole situation. Despite him controlling it well, Y/N could still tell. He paced as nervously as her, and his eyes darted around as if looking for the solution to this in the room. He eventually stilled, hands on his hips as he looked at the floor. With a sigh, he fell back onto a chair, running a hand over his face before gesturing around.

“This fight… it can’t happen on Earth.”

“Who said anything about a fight, Tony?” Steve argued but Tony and Y/N looked at him pointedly. Steve sighed. There was going to have to be a fight.

“We fought a big-headed alien once on this planet and that did not go as successfully as we wanted it to. We have to fight this out there,” he pointed to the sky, now hung with a star littered darkness. Y/N nodded in agreement but knew it was useless.

“Look… the only way to ensure defeat is… is for me to…”

“Y/N, no,” Steve instantly caught her meaning and shook his head furiously. “I’m not going to let that happen. We don’t trade in lives. And Bucky-“

“It will kill him, I know Steve. And I know you love him too. But I also have a duty to humanity. This is the only way.”

“But how?” Tony interjected, catching your drift immediately.

“I have to launch myself into a dying star.” Y/N said with a straight face and then laughed almost sadistically with the shake of her head.

“Ouch,” Tony muttered with a sigh. Steve winced.

“But, it’s no use.” Y/N hung her head and rested it in her hands, hair cascading around her like a waterfall, “As far as I know, you haven’t completely figured out the whole spaceship debacle here on Earth.”

Steve pursed his lips in thought and turned to Tony who was already reaching for what seemed to be a radio. He began punching in numbers, small beeps alerting Y/N to his actions. She looked up with a frown and Tony smiled sadly.

“No… but I know some people we can call.”


	8. Chapter 8

“Erm, Quill?” Gamora leaned forward, looking over his shoulder at the screen. It was flashing with a Terra logo. Quill hadn’t noticed, the extent of his multitasking occupied with flying this ship across the galaxy and enthusiastically singing along to ‘Rock Me Gently’ by Andy Kim.

“Quill,” Gamora repeated impatiently and Rocket turned to look with a frown. His eyes widened at the symbol and he reached out to hit Quill over the head.

“Ow!” Quill gasped dramatically, hand flying to his head as his brow furrowed, “what have I said about hitting the driver.” 

“That it was totally okay and would probably gain your full attention,” Mantis piped up from the back. Quill sighed.

“That was hit on, Mantis, and that was specifically to Gamora,” he turned to shoot a glare at Drax.

“I wanted your attention,” he shrugged, “you said it was the best-“

“Alright, alright, we aren’t getting into this argument again,” Rocket sighed, shaking his head, “you have incoming from your buddy with the plastic suit.”

“It’s Iron Man,” Quill jabbed a button on his dash to accept Tony’s call, switching all flying controls to Rocket.

“Looks like plastic to me,” Rocket muttered, turning to face the galaxy ahead.

“Tony Stark, what’s up?” Peter Quill reclined in his chair, a smirk on his face. When the two had parted ways after the Thanos incident, Tony had given Peter a way of communicating with Earth – more specifically, Tony – in case the Guardians heard of any intergalactic plots against their planet. 

“Yeah, and you just give us a call if you need the real superheroes to solve your problems for you,” Quill had retorted with a smirk.

“So, you tapping out?” Quill joked as Tony sighed on the screen in front of him, “in need of the big guns?” 

“We’re in need of your ship, Quill,” Tony emphasised, trying desperately to keep his voice level. “There’s an issue with…” He frowned, moving closer to the speaker on his display, “is that Andy Kim?”

“Sure is but back to the part where you were begging for our help-“

“-ship,” Tony interjected.

“Terra, Earth. Whatever you want to call it,” Quill shrugged, and Tony sighed impatiently again.

“Earth,” Tony closed his eyes, pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a deep breath. “Look, Quill, enough joking around. This is serious. If… if what happens happens, we’re talking about the destruction of the universe. Yeah, Earth – Terrra, whatever now, but-“

“Alright, alright,” Rocket huffed impatiently, steering the ship in the direction of Earth, “save your big doomsday speech for when we get there, plastic man.”

“Iron Man,” Tony corrected but sighed in relief. “Thank you, I’ll send you our coordinates.”

And with that, Tony’s face disappeared from the screen, leaving only the vast space beyond. It was silent for a while.

“I am groot,” Groot leaned over to mutter at Rocket.

“I don’t know pal. I mean, humans have a tendency to overreact but… Stark sounded pretty serious,” Rocket muttered, “let’s just hope we get there in time.”

 

Y/N was pacing again. The others had gone to rest or eat, knowing there was nothing they could do. It was a strange feeling. Usually they had an array of plans – at least a little more knowledge of what was going to happen. Except this time, it felt they knew too far ahead of the game for something like this. 

There was no improvisation here and yet none of them had a clue how they were meant to defeat this guy.

Bucky had tried to coerce Y/N to eat with him, and she had pushed her vegetables around her plate as the team ate in silence. She chewed relentlessly on her lip, thinking of all the other options she had. But all resulted in nothing good. Everything bad. 

“Y/N,” Bucky whispered when the others had left, clearing their plates. He lay a gentle hand on her shoulder and she whirled to look at him, fork clattering to her plate. She met his eyes, absorbing the concern and immediately knowing what she had to do. 

She smiled shakily, reapplying her strong face over the reality of her despair. Bucky watched and hoped he was really making her feel better.

“I’m sorry, Buck,” she whispered, shaking her head. “I was just… overthinking.” 

Bucky frowned and leaned down, pressing a soft and gentle kiss to her lips. Y/N kissed back, and Bucky noted a little more desperation on her end, her fingers gently tangling in his hair and pulling him closer. When they parted, she refused to quit him completely, pressing a soft kiss to his jaw and then his neck, her hands moving to grip his shoulders gently.

“It’s going to be okay,” Bucky wasn’t sure whether he was reassuring her or asking her if it was. Y/N sensed his unease and smiled against him. 

“It’s going to be okay,” She repeated.

“Come to bed,” Bucky pulled away completely, looking into her eyes. Y/N smiled again, cupping his cheek with her hand.

“I will in a bit, I promise. I just need to go over some things with Steve and Tony,” she murmured, any trace of panic gone from her expression. Bucky sighed with relief, moving to press a kiss to her palm.

“Don’t be long,” he muttered as he stood, walking backwards out of the kitchen as Y/N watched him leave. Once he was out of sight, she stood abruptly, abandoning her plate of untouched food on the counter. She practically sprinted to the conference room where Steve and Tony sat discussing, throwing the door open with a wild expression.

“He can’t know,” she said once Tony and Steve’s eyes fixed on her. They both frowned, glancing at each other.

“Who can’t know what?”

“Bucky can’t know what’s going to happen,” Y/N sat at the head of the table, knee bouncing anxiously up and down. 

“What’s going to happen?” Steve gulped thickly, leaning forward. 

“You know,” she looked him dead in the eyes and Steve felt everything grow heavier. He’d had some hope when Tony had called the Guardians – that maybe they had a chance of defeating this guy in space, and the thing Y/N had told them about would never have to happen. That he could spare Bucky of the pain. That he could spare himself of the pain of seeing it all over again. 

“He’s just… he’s just got you and…” Steve stammered shaking his head. 

“He will be fine,” Y/N reached over the table and placed a soothing hand over Steve’s, “I told you before Steve, this is the only way. I can’t let anything else happen.”

Tony watched the exchange in silence, interjecting only when he saw Steve’s shoulders relax.

“So, who do we tell the plan to?” He asked.

“Everyone but Bucky. These space guardians,” Y/N waved her hand, “the Avengers. They all know. But not Bucky. Tell Bucky the plan is to kill Ophiataurus-“

“-and why can’t we do that?” Steve interrupted angrily, shaking his head and repeating the phrase he knew too well, “We don’t trade in lives, Y/N. Never.”

“We have to, Steve,” Y/N’s tone was firm, outmatching Steve’s authoritative edge and sending both men into a stunned silence. 

There was a rumble from outside and Tony turned to the window, a blue light beneath a shadowed shape piercing the grey sky and flattening the trees around the compound.

“They’re here,” Tony stood. “Steve, get everyone out onto the ship.”

Steve nodded, jogging out of the conference room as Tony ran a hand over his face.

“You sure about this, kid,” he turned to you, a defeated look in his eyes. Despite knowing what Y/N was planning was the worst-case scenario, he also related to it. The self-destruct in defence of the planet was a tendency he too harboured and unlike Steve, was aware of how he couldn’t stop her now that her mind was set.

“Let’s go,” she stood, stalking out of the room and to the grass. 

She knew she had to make an impression and reinforce authority over the situation. This was her blaze of glory and she’d be damned if this group of strangers were going to reinforce authority over her like they’d done with Tony. 

So, as she watched the misfit crew clamber off the space ship onto the burnt grass, she changed from her normal human clothes into her guardian gown, a belt containing a sword and daggers hanging from her hips. She stepped out into the humid air, waiting until all eyes were on her until she rolled her shoulders and let her wings unfold from her back.

“Holy shit,” Peter’s jaw fell slack and Gamora elbowed him, despite the awe also etching across her face.

“Now that is just a full angel. No pirate, no baby. Angel,” Drax pointed enthusiastically and Y/N smirked as she approached.

“So, you’re the guardians of the galaxy?” She stood before them and Rocket grinned, leaning on the steps of the ship.

“That would be us, darlin, who’s asking?” 

“An actual guardian,” Y/N scoffed, reaching out a hand to the space between her and the group, “Y/N. Guardian angel.”

The group stared at her sparkling hand before Gamora stepped forward.

“I’m Gamora. This is Peter, Rocket, Groot, Drax, Nebula and Mantis.”

“Nice to meet you,” Y/N nodded, turning when she felt a presence behind her. The entire team, bar Fury and Maria were heading across the grass. She turned back to the group before her and smiled, gesturing to the stairs, “May I? We’re kind of running out of time.” 

“Oh right, sure,” Peter stepped aside, letting her climb the stairs first, following behind, “any specific destination we’re heading too, Ms. Angel.”

Y/N couldn’t help but chuckle at the name, shaking her head as her wings retracted back into her back to save space on the ship.

“The emptiest part of space you can get us to in four hours will do.”

-

The guardians wasted no time in setting off from Terra, under the intense instruction from Y/N and Tony to get them as far away from Earth as possible.

Bucky watched from a window as the planet grew smaller and smaller, in awe when they were actually in space. Y/N watched him for a while, letting him relish in the feeling alone before slowly approaching. 

She wasn’t expecting to be shocked herself at the view, but the vast expanse of stars and the shrinking planet below them knocked the air from her lungs and she choked on her words.

“It’s beautiful isn’t it?” Bucky murmured, arm wrapping around her waist and pulling her down to sit next to him. He rubbed circles with his thumb across her hipbone but froze when he realised he hadn’t answered her.

“I mean you probably see it all the time but-“ he cut himself off when he saw her expression of amazement, her eyes wide and reflecting the bright stars that travelled across the window, slightly watery, and mouth parted in wonder. She smiled at Bucky’s words and shook her head, leaning against his side.

“I was always too busy looking down to ever look up,” she whispered, the soft vibration of her voice travelling through Bucky and soothing him. 

“When I was little… back in the day,” Bucky chuckled, shaking his head. “It would never have even crossed my mind that this would ever be possible. Space was always there and we were here. We were never going to cross paths. Steve and I used to watch the stars and name the constellations like the nerds we were every night but… I never thought I’d be among them…” his face lit up with excitement and Y/N couldn’t help but beam at the expression he held. This was her Bucky. The science nerd. The gentle soul. The protector. 

And now she needed to protect him. 

“Bucky, I’m tired,” she lied, her voice barely above a whisper. Bucky looked down at her and smiled, laying back on the window seat they occupied and pulling her over his chest. 

“We can have a nap, doll, I’m sure they won’t mind,” he kissed her hair and let his eyes flutter closed. Y/N pursed her lips as she ran her hands over his chest, letting her powers send him into a deep sleep, waiting until she heard the soft snores from between his lips until she stood. 

“I can do that,” she whirled around to see Mantis watching, Drax by her side slowly raising a snack to his mouth. Y/N frowned at him and Mantis smiled, “He thinks he’s invisible.”

What kind of idiots had Tony brought her? But Y/N wasn’t about to unpack all of that now, instead giving the two a friendly smile before heading to the centre of the ship.

“All right, guys,” she called everyone’s attention to her, spinning a golden dust in her hands, ready to display her plan to the group. They gathered, transfixed by the stardust and Y/N sighed, beginning to weave pictures in gold.

“This is the plan…”


	9. Chapter 9

Quill took them to a planet, abandoned long ago by its inhabitants. The team kicked up piles of grey dust as they walked around, occasionally coming across a still intact flower stem that was practically a crisp.

“It’s perfect,” Y/N nodded, after examining the area herself. There were ruins of buildings and scraps of cars littered everywhere, but one particular area was a vast nothingness.

“Sorry I fell asleep,” Bucky sheepishly scratched the back of his head and Y/N tried not to give herself away by smiling reassuringly. She stepped closer to him and rested her hand on his forearm.

“It’s okay, I’ll catch you up on the plan,” she whispered, walking backwards towards the ship. Bucky followed like a magnet and the team watched on with knowing smiles.

“Is she sure about this,” Natasha turned to Steve once they were out of earshot. Steve sighed.

“I’ve asked her too many times now. She believes this is the only option,” he watched as she spun a golden lie before Bucky’s eyes. It was the basics she’d told the team - the big battle she was sure they were promised. But not the ending. The ending was different. Bucky was watching intently, nodding along with his arms crossed over his chest.

“You think she’s right?” Gamora moved to stand next to Steve, watching the angel too.

“I think she’s right that it’s the surest way to do it…” Steve trailed off and shook his head, clenching his fists. He’d stood by listening to her for too long. He’d let her convince him this was what needed to happen. But he couldn’t anymore.

“But it’s not the only way,” Natasha agreed, raising her hand in a beckoning motion to where the others stood in a small huddled group. Clint nudged everyone to attention, dragging them over to where Steve and Nat stood.

“Go over Y/N’s plan,” Steve instructed, and Clint frowned, looking to Nat and then at Tony by his side. They both nodded at him.

“By Rocket’s estimation, Ophiataurus is around three hours away. Judging by the course of his ship, he knows we’re here and is heading this way. He won’t be happy that this is no longer on Earth but as long as he gets Y/N he’ll be-“

“Alright, alright, Clint,” Natasha huffed, shaking her head, “Steve said go over the plan, not recite Y/N’s entire goddamn speech.” Clint narrowed his eyes at her, childishly kicking dust over her shins before continuing.

“Ophiataurus lands. He’s got a big army and we have what…. Ten people?”

“Optimism Clint,” Natasha grumbled again, and Clint turned to glare.

“I’m sorry that the Addams family of space have never heard of coffee before-“

“Hey, we have coffee,” Quill interrupted with his hands held up and Tony pinched the bridge of his nose as Clint’s exasperation grew, his face turning red with frustration and his arms flying out to his sides.

“IT’S GREEN. How do you expect me to drink that shit when it’s the colour of the fucking HULK,” he pointed an accusatory finger at Bruce who stumbled back from his aggression in shock. Peter scoffed, shaking his head.

“Oh, and your colour-of-shit coffee is so much better, huh?”

“GUYS!” Steve roared, earning the attention of Y/N who frowned.

“Everything okay?” She called out from across the space. Clint sighed, deciding to diffuse the situation.

“Just arguing about the green coffee,” He called back in a grumbling shout, folding his arms across his chest. Y/N smirked and shook her head at the answer, believing it undoubtedly and returning to her conversation with Bucky.

“Listen, Y/N thinks we’re just going to stand by and let her get killed. She thinks this one-woman mission she has going in her head is going to fix everything,” Steve took the matters into his own hands.

“So, let her,” Nebula shrugged, “If it saves your planet.”

“I can’t let her because…” he turned to look at Bucky, who was now seated on a rock with Y/N by his side, his hands in her lap as they talked in hushed tones.

“It’ll kill him,” Peter nodded in understanding, shooting a sideways glance to Gamora who took his hand in hers.

“I say we make a few calls and see if we can get anyone else here. Ophiotaurus thinks this is going to be easy, but he’s not an idiot. We’re probably outnumbered by a lot right now,” Steve ignored the scoff from Clint and continued on, “If we can get more people here-“

“-we can defeat Ophiotaurus before Y/N even thinks about going on her self-sacrificing mission.” Tony finished for him, already pulling out his phone.

“We can get a transmitter signal to anyone out there from the ship,” Gamora nodded towards the ship, already making the way over there. The team followed, smiling reassuringly at Y/N as they passed.

“And then, what?” Rocket huffed as they climbed the stairs to the ship, “Y/N will know what we’re trying to do.”

“Look, Y/N’s plan is to surrender right? Get onto his ship and drive it into the star,” Steve pointed to the sky where a star sat brightly amongst slightly dimmer ones, “I say, we give the guy a fight. Y/N is still probably going to surrender but he’s going to be more eager to get off the planet. If some of us sneak on to his ship when Y/N surrenders, we can catch him off guard and kill him before Y/N goes through with her suicide mission.”

A silence fell over the group before Gamora nodded.

“You got someone in mind to call,” she gestured to the contacting device sat at the head of the ship and Steve nodded to Tony, knowing he’d know what to dial. Tony smirked, sitting down in Quill’s chair as he tapped away at the screen.

“You already have his number.”

 

“Are you sure we can defeat him?” Bucky asked, his hands in her lap as she finished telling him the plan. Y/N let out a calm breath and smiled, leaning into Bucky’s side.

“It’s what we do. Defeat the bad guys-“

“Or become them,” Bucky snorted at his own joke despite the nerves of the task ahead coursing through him.

“You were never a bad guy, Bucky. It was never your label to hold,” Y/N defended him instantly and Bucky smiled at her answer.

“And it was never yours either,” he kissed her hair, inhaling the scent of her. The planet itself had the scent of burning to it. Burnt toast, gasoline fires, coal. But being so close to her made it all go away in waves of vanilla, coffee and roses. Against the grey dust, she practically dazzled, the white of her dress making her seem like a star shining through the clouds. She didn’t belong here, she didn’t belong on a planet like this. And although he knew she looked effortless when she fought - it reminded him more of a dance than fighting. Another example of exactly how unfitting she was to this lifestyle.

When his mind returned back to what was going to happen, a lump formed in his throat.

“What if it doesn’t work?” Bucky whispered, “What if we aren’t strong enough to kill him?”

Y/N felt her heart clench. She wanted to scream that it was never going to work. That this was never the plan. That Ophiataurus would only die if she died with him. But she couldn’t. So, she let out a melodic laugh and looked up at him with eyes full of optimism.

“He doesn’t know how strong we all are. And we have the Guardians now,” she nodded towards the ship where the new team was climbing aboard alongside their own. Bucky let out a shaky breath. He wasn’t entirely convinced. He was constantly plagued with thoughts of losing his loved ones. And today was no different.

But her comforting presence and optimism told him that this time, maybe it could be a little different. Maybe this would go off without a hitch. Maybe he had a reason to be optimistic. His hand skimmed across the fabric of her dress and settled on the skin exposed by the low cut back. Y/N leaned into the touch, looking up at him with desperation.

“Bucky,” she couldn’t help herself. She wanted him to be optimistic. She didn’t want him to worry. But she selfishly couldn’t leave him without saying it, “I want you to know that I love you.”

Bucky looked down at her with a frown, watching as she slipped her bottom lip beneath her teeth and bit down. His thumb rubbed smoothing circles across her skin and his other hand reached to cup her cheek.

“I love you too,” he murmured, “and don’t worry. We’re strong. We’re going to do this.” He replayed her words back to her and she felt a sob threatening to wretch its way through her throat. So instead she pulled him to her, moulding her lips against his until she felt the frustration disappear. Until she felt just him in her arms, with the false promise that it would be like this forever.

Bucky kissed her back softly, lacking the same desperation she held because he was sure this wasn’t going to be the last time he kissed her. This wasn’t going to be the last time he held her in his arms. This wasn’t going to be the last time he told her he loved her.

“Lovebirds,” Clint called from the ship, and the two broke apart, turning to the voice. “We need to gear up. Ophiataurus is moving faster than we expected. ETA an hour.”

Y/N nodded and stood abruptly, faltering slightly when Bucky slipped his hand in hers. He smiled at her and she squeezed his hand before both of them head towards the ship

 

It was silent on the ship as everyone prepped. The call had been made and back-up was on its way, but evidenced by his stressed pacing, Steve was sure it would be too late. Y/N put his pacing down to the real plan and didn’t question it, instead focusing on how Bucky’s hand felt in hers, how his lips felt pressed to her forehead. 

She looked into his eyes and noted how they were more blue up close. She saw flecks of silver in his beard - surprising seen as though his aging process was slowed dramatically - but maybe it was a sign that he was after all, still human. She noted silvering lines across his face from scars - not as bad as a usual human would have - but there nonetheless. It reminded her why she was doing this. To protect him from that again. To protect everyone from that. 

“He’s here,” Gamora nodded to the sky from where she stood at the window. His ship was landing across the way, jet black and seemingly made of obsidian. The team quickly descended from the ship and Y/N wasted no time getting ahead of them. 

The ground shook as the ship landed and most struggled against the force it was giving off, but Y/N cut through it like glass, ready to meet who descended. 

When Lilith descended, alone, she had been expecting it and smiled, waiting for the fallen angel to approach her. She was wearing black leather adorned with silver chains, and Y/N thought it was fitting given her captive state. 

“This all you brought, angel?” Lilith twirled the handle of her sword around her fingers, the blade slicing through the air. 

“It’s all I need,” Y/N replied, unsheathing her swords from her sides, “he too afraid to come out?” She nodded towards the ship where she was sure Ophiataurus sat.

“Why do it himself when I can do it just as well?” Lilith shrugged. The two danced around each other and back across the plain, Bucky stepped forward to help, but Steve held him back.

“This is her fight,” Steve said simply, watching as the two angels sized each other up. 

“Yeah, well, her fights are my fights,” Bucky grumbled, nerves evident in his voice. But nevertheless he backed down, watching from afar with the rest. 

“You going to kill me?” Y/N cocked her head an Lilith laughed a toothy smile, her teeth glistening in the starlight. If it weren’t for the look in her eyes and her newly acquired fashion sense, anyone could be fooled into thinking she was still an angel. But Y/N knew better.

“I wish,” Lilith truly sounded disappointed, “just maim you enough to get you onto the ship, ready to be used.”

“And what will happen to you, then, Lilith?” Y/N was careful when she said her name, sure to sound familiar. It shook Lilith’s facade a little, her eyes faltering and exposing a slight familiarity Y/N also held. But it was gone in a flash.

“Enough talking,” and with that she lunged, her blade striking out. Y/N dodged it easily, reaching out and snagging Lilith’s shirt. It only cut the material before the ex-angel leaped out of the way, just as effortlessly as Y/N, preparing herself for the next move. 

It was always Lilith instigating the movements, dancing around and then attacking, only for Y/N to sidestep out of reach and deliver a strike of her own. 

They were equally as skilled as each other in terms of ability, but Y/N’s patience was giving her an edge. Her retaliating blows always slicing into Lilith’s clothes, or occasionally skin, whilst Y/N’s pristine white dress remained unaffected by her opponents strikes.

Lilith was clearly more aggressive in her approach after a while, the irritation of not having an edge giving way to her vice - her desire to control. Her desire for vengeance.

“You don’t have to do this, Lilith,” Y/N said when Lilith’s strike failed to pay off, leaving her with Y/N’s sword to her throat and her arms held tightly behind her back. 

“It’s easy for you to say. You weren’t abandoned. Helpless. Not even on the planet you were trying to protect,” Lilith growled through gritted teeth, skillfully escaping Y/N’s hold, “I was cast away, a million planets away, with no hope, just the assurance that I’d live forever living with this guilt.”

She lunged again, sliding across the dust and aiming for Y/N’s legs. A cloud of grey floated around them and Y/N flipped gracefully in the air, the silk of her white dress cutting through the dust. She landed far enough away for Lilith not to strike again and she had no plans to retaliate.

“So you admit you regret what you did?” Y/N’s voice was soft and steady, her weapons still raised for protection, rather than for her opponent. 

“I regret what I did,” Lilith confirmed, standing and shaking the dust from her hair, “but there is no way in hell I am going back to being caged by them up there. Not after this. Never again.”

“You’re just going to be caged by him,” Y/N nodded towards the ship again. Lilith smiled sadly, this time her eyes betraying her expression of defeat - maybe not in this physical fight, but mentally. She raised a hand to her top, tugging on the chains which remained fixed to the leather.

“Maybe I was destined for this, no matter what realm I’m in.”

Y/N was about to respond, ready to offer some form of hope, when a loud rumbling of the ground interrupted them, a beam of light emitting from behind her.

“Aww yeah!” She heard Rocket call, and suddenly, from the beam of light were four figures, a man with cropped hair and an axe, a woman in a silver costume, some sort of rock man, and a man with jet black hair. 

“Thor!” Bruce shouted happily.

“Alright. Long time no see. What have we got this time?” Thor nodded at the team before turning and walking towards Y/N. She stared at the god in disbelief, confused as to why he was here. This was not part of the plan. Suddenly there was a primal scream from Lilith and then Bucky shouted Y/N’s name. 

Y/N spun, seeing Lilith launching toward her with her blade held high. She jumped instinctively and her wings released from her back to aid her levitation. She reacted instantly and threw her sword so effortlessly it looked like it just slipped from her gras. 

Except it was perfectly aimed, slicing through the air and driving straight through Lilith’s chest. 

It seemed like it happened in slow motion and Y/N watched her fall to her knees and then forward, trying to keep herself up a bit with her hands flat against the ground. The dust floated around her, hiding her form from the rest of them. 

Y/N landed and dropped her other sword, hand flying to her mouth. Everyone watched as the dust cleared and Lilith was revealed, defeated. It seemed like it should be a victory, but for Y/N, it wasn’t. She fell beside her fallen friend and helped her into a sitting position, the angel’s back resting on her shoulder. 

“I’m sorry,” Y/N whispered, shaking her head. “I never wanted to kill you. You should never have… this should never have…” She squeezed her eyes shut. 

“I’m free,” Lilith shrugged, wrapping her hand around the sword. “They sent me down here, with the curse that I shall never die until I am slain by the ones that I used to align with. This… this was my only freedom.”

“You were always trying to lose?” Y/N frowned. 

“Always trying to be free,” was all Lilith responded with before contorting her face in pain and pulling the sword with all her strength. It was discarded in the dust and Y/N let it disintegrate, the gold dust of its disappearance mingling with the grey ash before vanishing completely.

“Fuck,” Y/N whispered, shifting her body so Lilith lied flat on the ground.

“Fuck,” she repeated again this time louder, stalking over to where Thor was no stood with the others. She shoved Thor without fear, amused when none of his companions moved to help him.

“What the fuck are you playing at with that fucking entrance, I was getting to her,” She screamed at him, shoving him again until he stumbled into the rock man, a cascade of rocks crumbling around them.

“Aw man,” the man said, arms stretched out as he looked down at his crumbling torso. Y/N ignored him, turning to Steve,

“You called back up?” 

“Why aren’t you happy about this,” Bucky stepped in front of her, holding on to her forearm to stop her from shoving Steve, “we have more of a chance.”

Y/N looked into his eyes and regulated her breathing, hanging her head with a sigh. She crouched on the floor, head in her hands as she tried to wrap her head around what just happened. Bucky let her process for a bit, before crouching with her, arms wrapping around her as he whispered into her ear.

“I’m sorry,” he murmured. “But we have to continue. He’s still alive.”

Y/N nodded, reminded of the task at hand, before standing. She looked to Steve, asking for confirmation that he was still on board with the plan, before turning to face the ship. Ophiotaurus hadn’t exited the ship, but a gathering of smaller, mimicking ships were gathering around, and from them dismounted an army. 

“That’s a lot of people,” Thor muttered, lightning sprinkling from his fingertips as the rest of the team prepared, “Good thing we have more.”

As he said that, ships descended of different shapes and sizes, landing in their surroundings with soldiers dismounting immediately. They were less uniform than the army from Chaos, but just as generous in size. 

“Who the hell are these guys?” Y/N muttered angrily, forming new weapons from stardust. The woman in silver raised her eyebrow, impressed, unsheathing her own weapons from her belt.

“Excuse me, but who are you? I think that is the more-” Loki started but was cut off when Y/N scoffed. 

“I know who you are Loki, don’t get butthurt,” she raised her sword the woman in silver and the rock man, “I meant these guys.”

“Oh, well, I’m Korg, nice to meet you,” the rock man instantly launched into a spiel, “I’m here mainly because New Doug told me to be here-”

“How many times, Korg, it’s Thor,” Thor muttered, spinning his weapon around effortlessly. 

“Right, right, Lord of Thunder,” Korg muttered. Thor sighed and shook his head, muttering under his breath.

“God. God of thunder.”

Korg turned to Y/N and shrugged.

“The man’s got a bit of an ego.”

Y/N ignored him, turning to the woman and raising an eyebrow. She smiled sweetly - although it seemed false.

“Brunnhilde. Go by Valkyrie.”

Y/N grinned, and was about to discuss the similarity in their job description when Tony clapped his hands together, the metal suit clanging loudly. Everyone turned to where he was pointing, seeing the other army lining up, Ophiataurus descending the steps behind them. 

“Alright, team,” Steve stepped forward, level with Bucky and Y/N. Bruce growled, body shifting into the larger form of the hulk, who was then fist-bumped by Valkyrie, “time to go to work.” 

Y/N took a deep breath, clicking her neck before finally she raised her sword high.

“Let’s go,” she muttered, dropping her sword in front of her.

Everyone charged at the same time, Chaos’ army and Thor’s scavenged army alike. They met in a cloud of dust, weapons raised. Y/N flew upwards a little, giving herself a better vantage point to take down opponents. 

Bucky had a gun, but given the close combat, opted to use his knives. He took opponents out three at a time, earning himself a bit of resistance and a few injuries, but never serious enough to stop. 

Steve and Thor seemed to team up instantly, somehow combining Steve’s shield and Stormbreaker to make an ultimate weapon.

“Duck!” Thor called out, and Y/N watched as Natasha and Clint hit the floor in front of Steve and Thor, just in time for Thor to hit Steve’s shield like a baseball with Stormbreaker. It sliced through at least twelve opponents, and knocked out another five. 

“Y/N,” Clint shouted, drawing six bows from his quiver. Y/N caught his drift and swooped down, lifting him high so he could shoot from above, the explosive arrows defeating even more opponents. Someone threw something up at her, and whilst dodging it, her grip on Clint slipped.

But Sam was on it, catching the archer on his back and swooping away. Clint jumped from his back to a vantage point, settling there to take on opponents from afar.

“Thanks Sam,” Y/N called out when he swooped back, watching as he unholstered two guns and opened fire on below.

“‘s nothing, sweetheart,” Sam responded with a smirk as he flew past her.

“Cool it on the flirting, birdbrain,” Bucky grunted as he took two more out with the aid of Natasha, holding down three guys as she used her Widow’s Bite to shoot electricity at the opponents. 

“Cool it on the jealousy, Sergeant,” Y/N retorted, swooping down to assist him with another set of opponents. He smirked at her and she smiled back, swooping up to join Tony who was struggling to handle the projectiles thrown up at him. She crafted a shield from gold and threw it in front of him, the projectiles ricocheting off and returning back down to strike those that threw them. 

“Thanks,” Tony muttered, using his blasters to begin to assist Drax who was tackling each opponent that came his way with purely hand combat. 

Gamora was using a blade, alongside her sister Nebula.

“Peter!” She shouted out when an opponent came up behind him, too preoccupied with her own fighting to help him. Groot stretched his limbs outwards, piercing the offender with his branches and throwing him away from Quill. Quill only nodded in appreciation, returning to the fight with all his effort. 

As she looked around from above, Y/N realised how hard these people were willing to go. It wasn’t for her, she knew that. Maybe in Bucky’s case it was, but not everyone else. This was for the safety of Earth. The safety of the Universe. They were doing their bit to guard and protect.

Now it was time for her to do her part.

She descended to the ground, wings returning to her back. She produced her swords and when she was on the field, it was clear she was probably the most skilled fighter of them all.

She progressed through the enemy effortlessly, making up more ground than the others combined. Before long, she was reaching Ophiaturus.

Steve noticed her attention change, the dropping frequency of her hits proving she was done with this portion of the plan. Done with this portion of the fight. He got close to Bucky, tugging him aside, followed by Natasha, Tony and Gamora. 

“Ophiataurus,” Y/N’s voice called over the sounds of the battle, loud enough to make everyone turn. Ophiataurus watched as the angel descended, landing before him, weapons disintegrating into a wave of gold.

“Leave this place and take me,” she instructed.

“That easily, angel?” Ophiataurus raised an eyebrow. 

“My job is to protect him… If you take me… promise no harm will ever come to him,” she instructed and Ophiotaurus smiled, stepping closer. He outstretched his hand, laying it on her cheek - rough skin against smooth. Y/N tried not to react. 

“The entirety of humanity over one man,” Ophiotaurus mused, hand travelling over her shoulder and then to her wings. He plucked a feather and Y/N winced, turning her head. “You angels are much more human than I thought.”

His hand reached to the back of her neck and pulled hard, dragging her up the steps to his ship before throwing her on the hard, rocky floor.

“All this travelling, only for me to take you right back to Earth,” he sneered over her, switching something on his ship so it rose into the air. Y/N coughed and spluttered under the impact, raising herself with her hands to stand.

“He’s who I’m destined to protect. You promise me no harm comes to him in all of this, then I will do whatever you say,” Y/N repeated, spitting blood before rising to her feet. Ophiataurus watched her, arms crossed, an amused smirk on his face.

“You know how long I’ve waited for this?” He murmured, hand reaching out to run the silk of Y/N’s dress between her fingers. Y/N stilled, trying to remain calm.

“I imagine since the day you decided to hold Lilith captive,” She spat, unable to hold back her contempt for his actions. Ophiataurus laughed, grasping her dress and pulling her to his chest.

“She’s no use to me now,” He grinned, “You just took the trash out for me.”

“Ophiotaurus,” Steve’s voice echoed through the chamber and Y/N whipped her head around to see Steve stepping out of the darkness, his band of stowaways following him. Ophiataurus let Y/N go, eyebrows raised, and as soon as she could, she launched herself at Steve.

“What the hell, this wasn’t the plan Steve,” she growled and Bucky stepped forward.

“You’re too right this isn’t part of the plan, Y/N,” he muttered and she tried not to focus on the bleeding cut on his cheek. She reached out and placed her hand over it, her instant reaction to heal him, and she got halfway through - her golden magic piecing his injury together before he pushed her hand away, “What are you doing?”

“Ah, an ambush,” Ophiataurus’ sneering tone came from behind them before Y/N could answer. Steve stepped forward, ready to fight, and he packed a good punch. Ophiataurus staggered back a bit, but it was no use and he sent Steve flying across the room. Bucky was next despite Y/N’s grappling protests, desperate and pleading. Ophiotaurus went no lighter, and threw him across the ship too, his back cracking against the stone walls of the ship. 

“Stop,” she grasped for Natasha, but she ignored her, stepping forward to try her hand. Y/N grew desperate, launching into her plan early. She ran across the ship, avoiding Ophiotaurus’ eyeline as he attempted to get closer to Natasha who was skillfully dodging his hits. 

Bucky groaned, trying to stand, and his eyes fixed on Y/N adjusting something on the dashboard of the ship, returning minutes later. Gamora had moved to help Natasha, and Tony was blasting the villain from afar. Repulsor beams shot from his hands, but each blast was deflected into blue sparks by Ophiataurus’ armour. Steve struggled to his feet, assisting the team, and Bucky joined him. He was almost primal, desperate to bring an end to this fight, wild screams of rage sounding from his throat.

But it was no use. With one move, Ophiotaurus had them all crashing against a wall, wrapped in a metal that was constricting them tighter and tighter. 

“Stop!” Y/N cried out, sword raised as she tiptoed closer to Ophiotaurus. He turned to her, raising an eyebrow as the metal stilled. Suddenly, she flipped the sword and held it up, as if she was ready to drive it through herself. She knew it wouldn’t work - that it wouldn’t killed her. But she hoped he didn’t know that. When his eyes widened with fear, she knew the gamble had paid off.

“Let them go and I won’t do it. You’ll have all of me, you’ll have access to the realm, you’ll have everything,” she muttered, She watched the metal warp outwards, releasing the team with a crash to the floor, “Let them go.”

Ophiataurus nodded, throwing the team across the room towards the escape hatch of the pod. Y/N dropped her sword to her side, letting it disintegrate. Ophiotaurus stepped forward and gripped his chin between his thumb and forefinger.

“We’re going to do great things together, Y/N,” he grinned, preoccupied with opening the shuttle hatch to notice the gold dust forming in Y/N’s fingertips, too busy ensuring the team were in the shuttle to notice her raising the heavy item she’d crafted to his head, knocking him out cold so he fell to the ground with a thud. Bucky stood immediately, only for Y/N to whirl around and shove him back into the shuttle.

“What the hell?” He muttered, but Steve held him back. 

“Y/N,” Steve sighed leaning forwards, “You don’t have to do this, come with us.” His fingers wrapped around her wrist and tried to pull her into the ship. She protested, sending a debilitating pain through her system and into Steve. He let out a cry of pain and fell backwards. Gamora tried too, then Tony, but all fell back.

“There’s more like him, Steve,” Y/N sighed, shaking her head and turning away as Bucky looked at her in disbelief, “There’s always more like him. I can’t just keep putting humanity in danger with my presence.”

“Do what?” Bucky demanded, looking to Steve and then around at the group before his eyes settled on her. She looked at him sadly, leaning forward and placing her hands on his cheeks. She healed the last of his injuries, smoothing his hair over his face, before crashing her lips to his once more. Bucky kissed back desperately, tugging her to him as if it would succeed in bringing her back. 

“You can’t do this to me,” Bucky whispered against her lips, fingers wrapped tightly around the fabric of her dress, “you can’t leave me. I can’t… I can’t let you leave me.”

“I don’t want to leave you, Bucky,” Y/N sobbed, tugging away from him, and Bucky watched the fabric disintegrate in his hands, leaving her stood on the ship in a shorter dress and her hands on the button. “But i promise you, this is the only way. This would never have worked. I was never supposed to come down here,” she shook her head and wiped the tears from her eyes. 

She pressed the button that closed the door and Bucky launched forward, hands beating at the impenetrable glass with as much force as he could master. 

Her name was on his lips, the movement readable but not audible, and Y/N had to turn for a second at the look in his eyes, seeing the tears fall down his face. Steve pulled him back and Y/N turned to look at him again.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, sure he could read her lips, before finally the shuttled launched backwards towards the planet they had been on, falling away beneath Y/N. 

Y/N sobbed again, clutching at her knees as the pain shattered her heart, but she eventually stood, wiping her eyes. She moved over to the control panel where she’d already set course for the star. She sat in the chair, too big for her human-like frame and let her wings fold out around her in one last majestic stance, her fingers wrapping around the lever that would pick up the speed.

The star was getting closer and closer. She hesitated a bit, feeling the anxiety build up in her system, freezing her ability to control her body. She sobbed, painfully loud, filling the now silent ship with a heart-aching sound.

Y/N thought it would feel lonely doing this - that when it came down to the final act, she’d be able to do it because everyone would be gone. Back to safety. But they were still with her. The minutes she’d spent memorising Bucky’s face was coming back to bite her - the little things she’d never noticed before reminding her that she could turn back now and she’d see him again. She could turn back and have everything she ever wanted. Him.

Ophiataurus shifted and groaned on the floor, and the panic of never seeing Bucky again left her system. Either way, she would never see him again. If she turned back around, Ophiaturus would have her, and the galaxy would succumb to his power. So, she steeled her nerves and took a deep breath. 

“Here goes nothing,” she whispered to herself, pushing the lever forward so the speed picked up.

From the ship, Bucky watched, with eyes full of tears and his palms pressed against the glass, as the ship she was on collided with the star at full speed. It exploded into gold, settling among the stars around them.. He watched as it drifted around the ship, the silence of it all making it all so much worse, before finally, he collapsed to the ground, hands falling limply by his side.


	10. Chapter 10

There was a growing brightness, a small white dot that got closer and closer. until it wasn’t just white dot. Instead, cloudlike patterns of white and gold, glowing bright like the sun and speckled with stars.

Y/N felt her heart beat faster, apprehensive of whatever it was that was growing nearer. Was it the star again? Was she stuck in a state of repetition? Groundhog Day for angels. But then she broke through the clouds, air skimming over her skin and causing her somehow still in tact dress to flutter wildly around her. She didn’t feel a burning like the star. She didn’t feel pain.

She could hear then, the wind and the flapping of the fabric around her. She heard a clang of metal. She heard her heartbeat.

“Shit,” she murmured, and closed her eyes, letting out a deep sigh before she slipped into unconsciousness again.

Her hearing returned before her sight, and although there wasn’t much to hear, she still heard a little. Soft music from another room, a steady hum of electrics, her heartbeat again - this time steady.

Then she felt. Soft satin under her fingertips, hair against her cheek, something plush beneath her.

She pried her eyes open, her vision at first a blur until she finally adjusted, staring up at a sight she deemed too familiar - the gold lined clouds that hung over the rooms of the Guardian Angel Realm like a ceiling.

“Shit,” she muttered again, sitting up and looking around. She was in a typical room with a large gold, pillared bed, wardrobe and desk. It was her old room, clearly, her personal items strewn across surfaces - photos of her with other angels at parties for when their human got married, or had kids, or retired. Photos of Bucky before it went wrong - in his war uniform and on the beach with Steve. Photos after it went wrong - of Bucky in Wakanda with his goats and in the compound on Steve’s 100th birthday.

“You’re awake,” someone stated, as the white door to the room was pushed open. Stepping around the door was a figure Y/N knew all too well. She huffed in annoyance, throwing her head back against the headboard. Anthony rounded the corner too, along with two other superiors - Joe and Taika - before closing the door behind them.

Y/N fixed her eyes on them with a pout set on her lips.

“Awww come on. I die and I just get sent back up here? I thought I’d at least get sent to a place with good Wi-Fi. And a Burrito bar. And pictures of Ryan Gosling’s abs like… everywhere,” she folded her arms and all three men chuckled.

“Ryan Gosling does have spectacular abs,” Taika agreed, with a smile on his face.

“You should look at getting that installed,” Y/N turned to Stan, who was standing at the foot of the bed with his arms folded.

“We need to talk,” he smiled, but his tone indicated he wanted to move on to more serious matters. Y/N sighed and ran a hand through her hair. She climbed out of the bed carefully and dragged her hand across her form, changing her white sleeping robe into a pair of white jeans and a floaty top, golden Converse adorning her feet and her hair swept back out of her face.

“You didn’t tell me Ophiataurus was out there. I had to do what i had to do to keep this place safe-”

“-We know that,” Stan nodded to the door and everyone began to exit, Stan and Y/N first, followed by the three superiors. Stan continued, leading Y/N through the white corridors of the realm, “We need to talk about what you left behind.”

Y/N swallowed thickly, noting that he was leading her towards the main office - out of her block, across the courtyard and into the main building. People stared in awe at her as she passed, clearly having witnessed or at least heard of her actions whilst out of the realm. She wasn’t sure if they were pleased or hateful.

“I… I should never have gone down there,” Y/N shook her head, looking down at her feet, “I should never have been sent down there. It was too dangerous and it definitely did Bucky no good.”

Stan sighed, opening the doors to the main building with a wave of his hand and leading her through. It was silent for the rest of the walk, besides the steady steps of their feet on the marble floors. Finally, they reached the main office where Stan set, a room larger than the control room of her block and decorated elaborately. Stan sat at the head of his desk on a large, plush chair, the three superiors flanking him on less extravagant chairs. They all gestured to a small chair the other side of the desk for Y/N to sit in.

“You’re perhaps right that we should never have sent you down there,” Anthony nodded, leaning over the desk with a sad smile on his face. Y/N looked away from him and out the window.

“But you are mistaken in thinking that you did Bucky no good,” Stan’s voice was softer than his usual powerful tone and it made Y/N return her gaze to the men sat before her. She began to protest, frown set on her brow, but Joe interrupted.

“You were beginning to help him. He was facing his past, he was loving again, he was trusting again,” he squeezed her hand gently and Y/N gulped, thinking his words over.

“Your presence in his life was important - not just from up here, but down there too,” Taika agreed, leaning back in his chair.

“So what?” Y/N grumbled with the shake of her head, backing away from Joe’s hold on her hand and folding her arms over her chest, slumping in her chair. She looked out the window again and pursed her lips, “I can’t go back. It’s too dangerous. I messed it up.”

“You’re right that you can’t go back,” Stan nodded, voice full of wisdom, “as an angel.” He added suggestively and the room silenced. Y/N’s brow furrowed more as the words played repetitively in her head.

“As an angel?” She questioned, eyes snapping to his. Stan stroked his moustache and shrugged, lips quirking upwards in a smile. He moved his hands, one palm outstretched upwards in front of him and the other hand making a sprinkling motion, golden dust falling from his fingertips.

The dust formed an image, Bucky sat on the ship Y/N recognised as the Guardians’, head in his hands, body convulsing in sobs. Y/N felt tears sting her eyes and she turned away.

“Don’t show me that, please,” her voice was weak and shaky, threatening to expose the growing sobs in her throat. Stan took a deep breath and blew away the image, lowering his hands to the desk.

“Listen…” Stan sighed, encouraging the angel to turn and look at him. He smiled sympathetically.

“You’ve been through a lot - more than any angel here. And we made a mistake sending you down there. It was dangerous. It was a risk. It made the entire realm vulnerable and you were tasked with protecting us all - a situation we should never have put you in,” Stan said firmly, “we… we don’t want you to have to go through all of this again. Trying to get him through it and… and not knowing whether you can or not.”

Y/N glanced at the other superiors, all holding expressions that gave nothing away. So she took the bait, too intrigued by the opening gambit of his proposition to walk away. She leaned forward, eyes returning to Stan.

“What are you saying?”

“What I’m saying is…” Stan trailed off, trying to find the right words.

“We’re retiring you,” Anthony interjected, “your duties as an angel are over.”

“My… my… but,” if she retired, what would she do? Walk around trapped in this realm forever, never able to see Bucky again - in person or from up here. They all saw the wild panic in her eyes and smiled to comfort her.

“We’re retiring you because you are not going to stay here,” Stan said firmly, “we are stripping you of your powers so you can be sent back down to earth.”

“I… How… how is that possible? I’d be cursed like…” Y/N thought back to her fight with Lilith, the sword piercing through her and winced, looking down.

“Not exactly…” Taika glanced at Stan asking if he could explain. Stan nodded and Taika continued, “If you were stripped of your knowledge of the realm. No powers, nothing but the human make-up you possess, then you would be just another human being on Earth.”

“I wouldn’t remember him,” Y/N whispered and Stan sighed.

“That’s the catch,” Stan nodded. Y/N thought it over. It sounded like an escape for her. She could go to earth and she wouldn’t be plagued by Bucky’s torture.

“Your angel powers would translate into human traits. You’d be strong - for the strength angels possess. You’d be a humanitarian - for what the job entails-”

“You’d retain your ridiculous sarcasm,” Anthony joked but Y/N didn’t smile back, instead shaking her head.

“This is an escape for me, but Bucky… he’d have to live with my death and… and… if we met again it would kill him that I didn’t remember. That I forgot us… that I-”

“Hey,” Stan cut off her hyperventilating ramble, “we have a plan for that too.”

He nodded to the window and stood. Y/N joined him, standing beside him and looking out over the square. There was a gathering, of angels she recognised - clad in the colours and attire of her realm - and then angels she had only heard of.

The silver and blue of the Valkyrie. The white and red of the Nova protectors. The pure gold of the Sovereign guardians.

“Why… why are they here?” Y/N gasped, hand pressing against the glass of the window.

“We have the ability to erase memories but we don’t use it because it’s immoral. This, however, is a special case,” Stan turned to her, “Morality stands on both sides. It’s immoral to wipe memories of events, but is immoral to let you and Bucky and everyone else that experienced that to continue living through that pain. Soulmates separated forever. We need everyone we can to help with this.

“If…If that’s the case, then why haven’t we done this after Thanos? Wiped Ophiataurus’ memory? Why now?” Y/N frowned.

“Because not all realms are so compliant in the erasing of memories - no matter the cause,” Stan shrugged, as if it were that simple. He sighed and hung his head. “We are lucky that there were relatively few realms affected by this event, and the ones that were, are willing to do this with us.

“I live with the guilt of causing this by sending you down there. I want to fix it,” he turned and began walking out of the room, trusting Y/N would follow. She did, noting that the three superiors had already left the room.

“We all agreed to it, Mr. Lee,” Y/N shrugged, “We didn’t know the consequences fully…” she hesitated, stopping at the door and looking out over the mass of angels. “Are you sure we know the consequences now?”

“The consequences are that you will have no memory of Bucky and Bucky will have no memory of you. There is no guarantee that you will find each other. Ever. Your paths may never cross,” Stan pushed open the door.

“But if fate wills it so…” she murmured.

“There’ll be a good echo,” Stan smiled, producing something from his pocket. It was the quote she had pinned on your desk, “a reminder.” He said, slipping the paper into her hand. She fingered it carefully, the words making her lips curl up slightly.

“What will I remember?” Y/N cocked her head as they crossed the square, angels parting to let them into the centre. “What will I know?”

“You will know a false backstory,” Stan nodded, halting at the first step but indicating that Y/N should stand in the middle of the square, “Taika had fun writing it.”

Y/N laughed, shaking her head. Taika was probably the most eccentric of the superiors so whatever her backstory was, it wasn’t going to be a boring one. She shakily made her way up to the platform, looking out at the awestruck faces of the other angels.

“You’re okay with doing this?” Anthony stepped forward from the crowd of angels from their realm, worry etched across his face. Y/N slipped her hand into her pocket, pulling out a photo of Bucky she’d swiped from her room when leaving. It was from before, in black and white, and he was wearing his war uniform, smiling tightly at the camera. She replaced it with the quote and held the photograph before her.

“For the chance to see him again?” she murmured, smile creeping over her face, “surer than anything.” She outstretched her arm to Anthony handing him the photo before taking a big breath, smile widening as she cracked her neck and parted her legs slightly, eyes fixed on Stan.

“Alright, big guy,” she chuckled, loosening her hair and changing her outfit one last time into the typical white silk gown of a Guardian Angel - no Y/N twists. No accessories. For one last time Y/N was what she was meant to be - an angel unaffected by the trials of her job.

Her wings flexed from her back, slowly unfolding until they were tilted upwards and she hovered above the platform. The floor fell through, a steady beam of light climbing upwards, trying to reach her. She laughed nervously, shaking her head before taking a deep breath, smiling at Stan again.

“Beam me down, Scotty.”


	11. Chapter 11

Her alarm blared loudly, the sound shrill and isolated at first, before mixing with the sounds of the city and successfully rousing Y/N from her bed.

She groaned, clicking her back and stretching her arms, before throwing the covers from her body and kicking her legs off her bed, eyes still shut.

She could just quit. These early mornings were hell. She wasn’t sure she wanted to do this. Sometimes she wasn’t sure she was cut out to do this. A simple barista job or sales assistant sounded pleasant enough.

She ran her hand over her face and sighed. Time to go to work.

She rolled deodorant onto her underarms, combing through her hair quickly before tying it back out of her face. Then, she slipped on the uniform and her shoes, grabbed her bag and a piece of fruit from the fruit bowl on the kitchen table.

It took her over an hour to get from Bushwick to Washington Heights. Two stinky subway cars filled with either those that weren’t quite finished with the night before – jeering wildly and stumbling on broken heels – or those like her – the ones with the jobs that didn’t pay well but tested them in terms of time.

A few familiar faces sat by her on the train – the nurse from Bellevue, who’s friend always joined the carriage at Lorimer Street. A chef from a restaurant in downtown Manhattan, nodding off on his way to begin the breakfast service. A security guard for Wall Street, big with a stocky build, paid barely anything compared to the people he was tasked with protecting. The teacher from a school upstate, living with her grandma so she could look after her, but always on the train early so she could run the morning club set up for low-income children.

No one ever talked. They were too tired to. Everyone thinking the same thing – if I quit now, would it mean I’d never have to make this subway ride again?

Y/N only ever really learned of their jobs if she caught them on the train back home, spirits lifted from either a relatively reassuring day at work or the fact that the day was over and they were going home. She liked it when she was on the train back with the Chef. He sometimes brought half-drunk bottles of fancy champagne back from the job, sharing it with familiar faces as they crossed from Manhattan to Brooklyn.

Everyone filtered off and on eventually, more regulars nodding their head at Y/N in greeting or more drunken rich kids stumbling through the carriage, oblivious to the struggles of those working long hours.

Eventually, they reached Washington Heights, and Y/N dragged her feet across the subway car and onto the platform, pulling herself up the steps and across the streets to Morgan Stanley Children’s Hospital.

“Morning, Y/N,” the regular security guard beamed at her, always cheerful and always friendly. She smiled back, shrugging the defeated look from her face and replacing it with one of joy.

“Morning, Robbie,” she nodded at him in thanks when he held the door open for her, “shift nearly over?”

Robbie nodded, clearly ecstatic at the fact, “just as yours begins.”

“Don’t remind me,” Y/N laughed heartily, squeezing his shoulder. “Have a good day. I hope you rest.”

“And you,” Robbie nodded, letting her move through the hospital.

Her job had at first been a nurse. But with government funding low and a moral obligation to keep surgery costs at the lowest price possible, she had been approached about her engineering degree. It was something she had completed six years ago, with professors promising she would go far with it.

But then her father had gotten ill and she’d had to care for him full time. So, when he’d died, leaving her parentless with a staling engineering degree, she just jumped into the profession she knew best – nursing.

Two years ago, they’d asked her whether she’d be interested in assisting them with their prosthetics division – half of her time spent there and half completing her regular duties. It was a boost in pay, although not by much, and over the years she’d found the balance between working with the prosthetics and working as a nurse had shifted, heavier on the engineering side.

“Morning, sugar,” her friend Sarah called from the nurse’s break room, unwrapping a cereal bar with hooded eyes. Y/N smiled, shrugging off her bag and hanging it over the coat rack. She collapsed into a chair with a large huff of breath and threw her head back, cracking her sore joints.

“Tough ride?” Sarah asked, moving behind her and running her fingers across the tense muscles on her back. Y/N hummed in appreciation. Sarah had been a masseuse before here and nurses often fled to her in between shifts so she could soothe their aches and pains.

“Just a ride, y’know,” Y/N sighed, “always tough.”

Sarah just nodded.

“You working on the ward or in the lab today?”

“Bit of both,” Y/N smiled when she moved away, feeling suitably relaxed enough to open her eyes and sit up straight again, “helping with the installing of the prosthetics. Working on some broken ones. I’ve got an old patient coming back in for a programming check-up.”

“Sounds like a busy day,” Sarah murmured, grabbing a smoothie from the table beside her. Y/N smiled and shrugged.

“Just a day.”

“Alright, Carter,” Y/N pushed open the door to the room whilst looking down at her clipboard. It was a form filled out by the parents about what worked and what was a little faulty. Thankfully, it was overwhelmingly functional with little glitches and Y/N smiled, looking up.

“How’s the leg?” She asked the boy of seven years old. He was sat on a bed, swinging his legs – one lightweight metal – energetically, an overjoyed expression on his face. Beside the bed were his parents, smiling down at him, and then another technician from the prosthetics lab, ready to assist Y/N if she needed it.

“Y/N!” The boy cheered, outstretching his arms towards his nurse. Y/N grinned, bending down and hugging him, lifting him and spinning around once before setting him down on the bed.

“It’s amazing, Y/N, really,” the mother said, shaking her head almost in disbelief, “like it was never even gone.”

“That’s great!” Y/N beamed, kneeling down in front of the bed. She dragged over a stool, tapping it to indicate the boy should put his foot there, and he did without question.

With that, she began analysing the prosthetic, touching a button and entering a code to access the electronics.

“Everything seems to be in working order,” Y/N hummed, “you said he sometimes had difficulty bending the joint?”

“Occasionally, but only when he’s tired,” the father nodded.

“That might come with the weight of it… it shouldn’t be too heavy – lighter than his normal leg, but given it isn’t actually a part of him, it might be a bit more difficult to move,” Y/N mused, shutting the control panel and bending the joint carefully.

“And when he grows?” The mother questioned.

“These plates,” Y/N tapped the metal plates that formed the leg, “Should shift with his growth up until his early-teens. You’ll need to replace the leg then and then once more when he’s completed his growth. We can set an alert with the panels if you’d like? That way both you and I will know when he’s due an upgrade.”

“That’d be great, thank you Y/N,” the mother squeezed your shoulder and Y/N shrugged, flipping open the control panel again and gesturing to the other technician to bring a laptop. She began coding something, testing it by flexing the plate outwards until she heard the alarm.

“That didn’t hurt did it?” She looked up to Carter who grinned and shook his head.

“Tickled a little.”

“Okay, good. Now this alarm is theoretically built for when he needs an upgrade based on plate shifting, but remember the only one who knows how comfortable it is, is Carter,” Y/N nodded at the boy, “Carter, you’ve got to tell your parents if this ever becomes painful or uncomfortable and then they will bring you to me to make it better, okay?”

“Okay,” Carter nodded and Y/N squeezed his leg, smiling.

“The sensors working okay?” She asked, tapping his shin. Carter nodded and Y/N brought her hand to his knee, tapping sharply on the false patellar tendon in his knee. The false leg jerked like a normal leg would, confirming the reflexes were still working.

“Brilliant,” Y/N stood, moving the stool so Carter could put his leg down, “you’re all set.”

“I don’t want to go,” Carter pouted, and the parents sighed, preparing for a tantrum. But Y/N smiled, squeezing her patient’s shoulder.

“Don’t worry buddy,” she said calmly, “I’m going to helping out on the trip on Friday.”

“But Fridays are your day off,” the other technician frowned. Y/N just shrugged. She enjoyed doing them, and the kids she helped liked it when she showed up. It was the least strenuous task of her work and she always felt guilty if she didn’t go and a child brought up her absence.

“Thank you, Y/N,” the father smiled gratefully at her as the mother shrugged Carter’s coat over his shoulder, “we don’t know what we’d do without you.”

Y/N smiled, opening the door for them and the mother reached out to hug her.

“You’re our guardian angel, I swear,” she whispered in her ear, emotional. Y/N sighed in relief.

There was why she did this.

When Sarah told her there was someone waiting for her in the prosthetics lab, Y/N had thought there had been an issue with one of the children she’d helped. Maybe there had been something off in Carter’s new coding. Or in Jessica’s arm since she’d grown out of the last one.

So, she practically sprinted from her regular nurse work in the furthest ward from the lab.

What she wasn’t expecting to be waiting for her there were three very well-known figures – Tony Stark, Pepper Potts and Happy Hogan. They were admiring something on her desk – an arm for a child coming in later this afternoon, muttering to each other in low voices.

Y/N glanced around in confusion at her colleagues, who all shrugged, and then she glanced down at her nursing scrubs, messy and sweaty, covered in food a patient had thrown at her. She cursed herself for leaving her change of clothes in the break room, trying to tame her hair and straighten her scrubs to at least being semi-presentable.

“Can I help you?” She asked after clearing her throat, stepping closer to the figures. They all turned to look at Y/N, frowning at her outfit.

“You’re a nurse too?” Tony cocked his head, intrigued, “they told us you’re the best engineer here.”

“I… I mean yes but… they can’t afford to pay me full-time. I didn’t want to leave my patients here so I split my time between this and nursing,” Y/N explained.

“Wow,” Tony breathed out, glancing at Pepper, “must be tough.”

“The reward outweighs the cost,” Y/N shrugged, thinking back to Carter’s mom’s compliment from before, a smile quirking at her lips.

“We’re looking to hire you,” Pepper announced, and Y/N choked on her breath, opening her mouth to respond but nothing coming out. Pepper continued anyway, smiling at the woman’s disbelief, “We’ve been in discussions with this hospital for a while now and we are going to take over the prosthetics division, opening up a specialist hospital upstate.”

“Upstate, but… I live in Bushwick,” Y/N shook her head.

“Bushwick?!” Tony spluttered, shaking his head, “that’s an hour away from here.”

Y/N shrugged, and Pepper rolled her eyes, ignoring Tony’s outburst.

“Along with the hospital, we’re opening specialised living quarters, for all our staff. Cheap rent, close to the hospital,” she waved her hand as if it were nothing, leaving Y/N with an aghast expression on her face, “It would be adults as well as children but… we wanted you to be lead technician. We’ll train you up a bit more… you’ve been working with…”

Tony lifted up the metal arm. It was lightweight metal but even Y/N had to admit it wasn’t the best material to work with. It was no Vibranium, but it’s what the hospital could afford.

“We do our best with what we can afford,” Y/N was immediately defensive, frowning at the intruders. But neither Tony nor Pepper reacted badly, smiling instead.

“We know, and considering you have these materials and nothing else, you are doing an extraordinary job. The tech is… astounding. Some of the best I’ve seen,” Tony admitted, stepping forward, “We want to give you the opportunity to work with better.”

“This is what patients can afford, Mr. Stark,” Y/N shook her head, “They’re not all lucky enough to be able to pay the best surgeons to smuggle illegal Vibranium to build the best tech.”

“This is going to be affordable,” Pepper stepped in, “Wakanda is ready to share its resources with the world and we have agreed with them a price for shipment of Vibranium. We are also using our own lightweight metal compounds and plastics, all low cost. Lower than these,” she gestured around the room at the prosthetics being made.

“There’s got to be some sort of catch,” Y/N frowned. Tony just smiled.

“You’re like me. Seen too much to not have some cynicism,” he lay the arm down on the counter, “let us take you to the hospital. It’s built already.”

“I have to work,” Y/N argued.

“I’m sure they can get someone else to fill in for you,” Pepper smiled and Y/N sighed, shaking her head. She glanced at her superior who just nodded.

“Fine,” She turned towards the door, “let me change out of my scrubs.”

For three months, Y/N worked with Shuri. She trained her on modern techniques using Vibranium, particularly its magnetic capabilities. She was a laugh to work with, now in her early twenties and easy to talk to. The two hit it off immediately, hanging out more after work and playing pranks on Tony whenever he came to check up on the compound.

Unfortunately, Shuri wasn’t a permanent fixture at the hospital and when she felt Y/N was ready to go it alone, she was packing up to relocate – ready to train another person somewhere else in the world on the wonders of Vibranium tech.

“I’m going to miss you,” Y/N pouted, laid on her stomach on Shuri’s large grey bed as Shuri packed up her things. Shuri smiled sadly at her friend, zipping the suitcase up and standing with a sigh.

“I’m not disappearing forever,” Shuri shrugged, “Besides, you’re ready to take over now. And you have your first patient.”

She pulled a tablet from her desk drawer and handed it out to Y/N.

James Buchanan Barnes.

“The… The White Wolf?” Y/N looked up, wide eyed, “Holy shit!”

Shuri laughed, shaking her head as Y/N flicked through the file. There was a mass of detail in there, about his injury, about his original Hydra produced arm and its negative effects on his body and then about his new arm, constantly being improved by Shuri. Then, there was pictures.

“Holy shit!” Y/N exclaimed again, holding up a photo of a shirtless Bucky trying on a prototype of his new arm, “Why haven’t you sold these to like Perez Hilton or something, hot damn.”

“Ew, stop, the guy’s like my brother,” Shuri shoved Y/N, lifting her bag onto her shoulder.

“No but seriously,” Y/N smiled locking her tablet, “Is there like a rule on dating patients?”

“You literally work for a man that started dating his secretary,” Shuri deadpanned, trying to ignore her friends suggestive wiggling of her eyebrows, hitting away her advances with a fit of giggles. Shuri sighed, pulling Y/N into a hug as she stood up.

“You’re honestly the devil, you know that right,” she muttered into Y/N’s ear, pulling back and walking out of the room with Y/N following.

“Please,” Y/N scoffed, “I’m practically an angel.”

“Alright, then,” Y/N cracked her neck, taking a deep breath before pushing the door open, “charming, cool, not too inappropriate.”

“You know I can hear you, doll,” a gravelly voice sounded from the other side of the glass and when she looked up, Y/N saw Bucky Barnes staring right at her.

“Shit,” she muttered, hitting her head with her palm. Super-hearing had been in the file. She pushed the door open with a smile on her face and Bucky cocked his head at her.

It had been three years since he’d returned to the Avengers compound and in the last year or so, people had seen a change in the man. He was more confident, therapy was working in separating his trauma from his daily life to a large extent, and Steve noted he was almost the same Bucky he’d been around in the 40’s. Suave, nerdy and a hell of a laugh.

Sam was responsible for drawing some of that out of him too. The banter they shared turned Bucky into a sarcasm machine, and Shuri and Peter treated him like a fun uncle, teasing him to no end and enjoying it when he playfully retaliated with snide comments.

“Do I know you?” Bucky’s voice made Y/N jump, looking up from organising her equipment. She frowned, stepping forward.

“I’m replacing Shuri now that she’s-“

“I know that,” Bucky chuckled, his laugh warming Y/N’s heart and she swore he was making her swoon with that smile, “I just mean, you look familiar.”

Y/N smirked, deciding to have some fun. She approached him, gesturing to his arm and he held it out.

“I did some hardcore BDSM porn back in college,” she murmured, tinkering with the control panel. Suddenly, Bucky spluttered, his cool front breaking as his eyes widened and he fought to fix the situation he’d backed himself into. Y/N looked up, smirking at the reddening blush that was spreading across the man’s face.

“I’m kidding,” her smile was brighter than any he’d ever seen, and Bucky swore his heart stopped, “but interesting that you didn’t immediately deny watching that… nice to know what you’re into.”

“I’m not.. I don’t,” Bucky sighed, slightly defeated and Y/N giggled, sending shivers across Bucky’s spine. He smiled too, letting out a defeated laugh and watching as she worked.

“You’re good at this,” Bucky murmured, watching as Y/N ran program testing through his system. Y/N just shrugged.

“Shuri invented it, I’m just maintaining it,” she mused, testing the movement capabilities. The fingers whirred, and Y/N couldn’t tear her eyes away from them. Bucky grinned, noticing her focus and enjoying it. Y/N shook herself from her work daze, smiling shyly at Bucky before pulling up a chair, sitting beside him.

She ran her fingers softly across the plates and Bucky didn’t flinch. She hummed, and Bucky frowned, watching as she pulled out her tablet and popped open the control panel.

“I’m just going to try something…” she mused. Bucky was surprised how calm he felt with that statement. Despite his progress he still only trusted two people with programming new settings into his arm – Shuri and Tony Stark. And yet her she was, a practical stranger sending his mind into overdrive and making him feel more relaxed than he’d ever felt in his life.

Y/N finished her tinkering, shutting the panel and setting the tablet aside. She smiled up at him and Bucky swallowed thickly.

“Ready?” Her voice was full of excitement and suddenly, her fingers were running back over the plates, as soft as before, except this time Bucky felt it and jerked towards the touch. He gasped at the sensation.

“How… how did you do that?” His eyes were wide and a smile was spreading across his face. Y/N just shrugged.

“I noticed something in the programming and thought I’d try something I used in the prosthetics of the kids at Morgan Stanley.”

“I… I could feel a little before but only the basics… the hard stuff,” Bucky whispered, running his flesh hand over his newly programmed Vibranium arm. He felt the soft sensation of skin against skin and smiled wildly again, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Here,” Y/N whispered, leaning closer. Bucky watched as she wrapped her fingers softly around his wrist and held his hand up. Gently, she pressed her other palm to his, fingertips against fingertips. Bucky felt everything, the heat, the texture of her fingerprints, the soft tickle of skin brushing against his.

“That’s incredible,” Bucky moved his metal hand, taking Y/N’s hand in his and running his metal fingertips across her skin. Y/N let him, happy that he was happy with it all.

“I can do a number of things…” Y/N murmured. Even after a few minutes, Bucky was experimenting with his new sensations. He’d boldly moved onto Y/N’s hair, beaming at her as he combed it through his fingers, the strands tickling the sensors in his arm, “if you come to me before missions I can either up the sensors if that’s helpful, or lower them if you want to feel less pain.”

“I don’t want to change it,” Bucky shook his head, hand finally dropping from her hair, “thank you.”

Y/N stood, thinking this was the end of the session, setting aside her tools and folding her arms over her front. Bucky stood too but didn’t move to leave, hesitating slightly with his eyes fixed on her, before he smiled again.

“You’re an angel, I swear,” he chuckled, shrugging on his coat and relishing in the feeling of wool against his arm.

Y/N laughed a melodic laugh that he could swear he’d heard before, perhaps in his dreams.

“If I were an angel, I would’ve been cast down here for breaking the rules,” Y/N shook her head, pressing her hand to Bucky’s shoulder to lead him out of the room.

“That sounds like an interesting story,” Bucky murmured, stepping closer to her. Y/N’s breath caught in her throat and she pursed her lips when Bucky raised his metal hand to her cheek, grinning happily when he could feel her soft skin and the pattern of her cheekbone beneath his thumb.

“How about I tell you it over dinner?” Y/N asked boldly, eyebrow raised. Bucky’s grin widened, shaking his head at the feeling washing over him. Y/N stepped back and Bucky produced a scarf from his pocket, wrapping it around his neck as he walked backwards down the corridor, raising his hand to wave.

“Sounds like Heaven, Angel.”


End file.
